Voranai Vanijaka
Could it be Maj Gen Khattiya "Seh Daeng" Sawasdipol, the hardline opponent of the PAD who spoke of a full-scale war and threatened attacks with hand- and rocket-propelled grenades, even as his own daughter was among the PAD supporters?
Could it be retired Police General Salang Bunnag, who planned to lead government supporters in retaking Government House, armed with "equipment" supplied to him by "friendly" countries?
Could it be the militant supporters of Thaksin Shinawatra, or those who used explosives against the PAD during the tragedy of October 7?
Could any of these (or their "handlers") be suspects in Thursday's and Saturday's pre-dawn bomb attacks on PAD supporters that have left one father dead and more than 30 people injured?
Of course not. According to the authorities, none of the above are on the "suspect" list; none warrant an investigation.
Now I'm not saying any of these people are guilty of the crime. For all I know, they could all be innocent of any involvement.
All I'm saying is, if force has been used, and you do not know who was responsible, perhaps you might want to look first at those who have threatened to use force?
Is this not Police Investigation 101? Or have I been watching too many episodes of CSI (Crime Scene Investigation)?
Those who are on the police "suspect" list are: 1) those intending to boost the turnout at the PAD rally site; 2) quarrelling PAD members - that is, an internal conflict; and 3) those wanting to "scare" the protesters away from Government House.
Admittedly, I am a fan of conspiracy theories; after all, one should never underestimate the evil that man is capable of - 4,000 years of human history is testimony to that. Yes, the PAD might actually kill their own to further their cause. But surely, the PAD themselves should tag well behind the aforementioned when compiling a list of suspects, shouldn't they?
Of course, there are those wanting to scare off the protesters. But then, given all the bombs that have been thrown at the PAD these past few months, why are those people on the suspect list always faceless and nameless? Especially when there are actual real life individuals making threats to use force?
Again, is this not basic police work? Or should I stop watching CSI?
Where is David Caruso when Thailand needs him?
I don't fault the underpaid, hard-working police out there on the street. After all, they can only do as they are told by their superiors ... their superiors who have superiors, who in turn have superiors.
But really, will our police ever catch anyone worth catching?
Remember the New Year bombing at CentralWorld a few years back? No one has been caught yet. In fact, when any fatalities have been related to political/social unrest, has anyone ever been caught, found guilty and sentenced?
Like those past incidents, no one is likely to be caught in any of the recent attacks on the PAD rallies - and just to show objectivity, if bombs exploded at a UDD rally, in my opinion no one is likely to be caught either.
In the above cases, perhaps through a miracle and divine intervention by Zeus himself, some low-level lackeys will be handcuffed - but certainly no one of "influence". Know why?
For decades, Thailand has been besieged by a mastermind criminal, the sort of evil genius who, with one mischievous wink, has the likes of Lex Luther, Dr Evil (and Mini Me) and any of the James Bond villains lift up their skirts, scurry under the table, curl up foetus-like, shaking and sucking on their thumbs like a girl scout who just had her cookies stolen by that strange, balding, obese, middle-aged man who lives alone in a van down by the river.
Do you know who this mastermind criminal, this evil genius is? No? Well, thank goodness that you are reading my column then.
His name (or it could be her - don't want to be sexist here) is "The Invisible Hand" (aka "The Malevolent Third Hand").
This evil is answerable for all the woes affecting the Kingdom - from the student massacres in October 1973 and 1976, to Bloody May 1992, to the present political unrest, and every calamity before, in between and hereafter.
The names sound familiar? That's right, they have been mentioned by the police, accused by politicians and written about by the press for years. Not only that, in the lingo of young Thais, this naughty prankster is also called Gig (The Third Hand) who steals boyfriends and girlfriends left and right.
So there you have it. Thailand doesn't need David Caruso; we have Voranai Vanijaka.
The police, citizens, expats, illegal aliens and foreign labourers all should immediately be on the lookout for The Invisible Hand (aka The Malevolent Third Hand, aka Gig).
The problem is, how do you catch someone invisible? This is why he (or she) has evaded capture for so long.
You think I jest? You think I take the mickey? I beg to differ.
There's poetry in painting Thailand's distress with a satirical brush, stroking more truth than people may want to stomach, refusing to be caught up emotionally and ending up a pawn in political games, pinpointing the real cause behind a nation's many tragedies.
The Invisible Hand, the enemy of Thailand, is a thing we can't touch, we can't see. It's the callousness of those who rule, the self-deception of those who are ruled, the carelessness of those above and the laziness of those below. The hypocrisy, voluntary ignorance and misplaced anger in us all that has allowed - with impunity - so many deaths and so much sorrow, for so long, in a country we all claim to love so much.
If we want to save the soul of the Kingdom, we should start by cutting off The Invisible Hand ...
And that, dear readers, is more serious, has more substance and more consequence than a bottle of Chinese milk.
voranaiv@bangkokpost.co.th
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