Next to nothing

The last time Cage astutely capitalized on his depression-induced countenance was in Spike Jonze's Adaptation, in which he teased and touched us with the melancholia of a neurotic nerd. His tragic turn as a suicidal alcoholic in Leaving Las Vegas, in 1995, seems like a chapter from a forgotten history.

Indeed he tries hard every time. But what is there for Cage to salvage from a tiresome venture like Next? He's not alone here, however, as a wasted talent wrestling to rise above his material; Julianne Moore turns up looking comically serious as a tough-chick FBI agent, but she also looks almost embarrassed, as if afraid of being caught appearing in something she knows is a dud.

It's not just about Cage's or Moore's misguided choices of roles, but perhaps Hollywood, in its fevered pursuit of sequels and remakes, has lost some of its faculties in making sensible thrillers, and left its talents between bad and worse options.

Knowing that Next is based on Philip K Dick's story is hardly a consolation. Dick's fatalistic vision and frequent zonked-out trips into a society gripped by paranoia leave no traces here as Next works neither as an existential sci-fi, nor a munchie action spectacle, though it has the ingredients of both.

As I watched Cage, in all his hangdog sincerity, aiming his schmaltzy pick-up lines at the buxom blonde of his dreams, it only gave me the hope that weird-looking guys can actually win good-looking babes.

The Cage character has the ultimate advantage though. He plays Chris Johnson, aka Frank Cadillac, a small-time magician in a gaudy Las Vegas parlor who claims that he can read minds and predict the future. It turns out that Chris can really see into the future, two minutes ahead, but only the incidents that directly involve him. Subjected to demoralizing scientific tests as a child, Chris comes to see his supernatural talent as a stigma. He exploits it just enough to make a living as a magician who reads minds and a gambler who reads cards at blackjack tables.

In a setup that seems dated and stale, a gang of Eastern European-looking terrorists have smuggled a nuclear device into LA with a plan to bomb the living daylights out of the United States. To counter this, the FBI, led by agent Callie Ferris (Moore), is determined not to track down the baddies but to use all their available resources to locate Chris and force him to use his clairvoyance to save his country (I bet during the Cold War, the KGB failed to coerce the spoon-bending Yuri Geller into providing them his paranormal services, and that's why the Russian never got to beat the American - just a thought).

Like all reluctant heroes, Chris doesn't want to co-operate at first because of his deep mistrust of the government and because he's obsessed with finding the woman he keeps seeing in his vision. He should've known that things always get complicated when a girl is involved, and they actually do when Chris finally meets up with Liz (Jessica Biel), a part-time teacher of Native American children, to whom the magician dispenses his careful choices of impressive lines based on his foresight.

''To see the future is to change the future,'' intones Chris. But the metaphysical manipulation of time - of the present that could affect the outcome of the future, and of preordained destiny and humans' power to chart their own courses - isn't explored in any meaningful way in Next.

What we see a lot is Cage closing his eyes intensely (quiet! He's peering into the future!) and then telling the FBI agents who rely on his prescience to dodge incoming bullets, locate hidden snipers, and warn them of buried bombs.

Chris's portal to the future has a two-minute range, but in a Thai short film from last year called 3 Minutes, a man can look into the future exactly that long, and he uses that ability to avoid his own death in a somewhat more thrilling fashion than this Hollywood lemon does (the Thai film runs at six minutes). After Next, we who still have some faith left in Nicolas Cage can only pray that he'll make a wiser choice next time.

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consolation a source of comfort to somebody who is upset or disappointed fatalistic the philosophical school of thought to which all events are fated to happen, so that human beings cannot change their destinies zonked-out exhausted to the point of hardly being able to function existential relating to the being of humans schmaltzy too much sentimentality buxom with large breasts aka also known as gaudy too brightly colored or showily decorated demoralizing to destroy the courage, confidence, or hope of a person or group stigma the shame or disgrace attached to something that is socially unacceptable stale no longer fresh, or new

clairvoyance seeing what is not normally seen, for example the future coerce to make somebody do something against his or her will by using force or threats paranormal impossible to explain scientifically obsessed never stop thinking about something dispenses gives a service or advice to several people foresight to be able to see what's in the future intones says something, especially in a slow and serious way metaphysical relating to the philosophical study of the nature of being and beings manipulation to in some kind of way control or influence somebody or something preordained to decide in advance that something will happen prescience knowledge of actions or events before they happen