Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby MonkeyP on Sat Sep 25, 2010 5:59 pm

If I saw you coming I'd probably speed away to.
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby sundayjam on Sun Sep 26, 2010 1:37 pm

MonkeyP wrote:If I saw you coming I'd probably speed away to.


Way to stay on topic, MonkeyP.

Supposedly Thai's never say no. Yet, I always hear, "Not have." "can't go" "don't want" or "can't do" Isn't this really just another form of saying no? I suppose I am just a 'silly' farang who just doesn't get this subtle aspect of Thai-ness.
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby benp on Sun Sep 26, 2010 10:36 pm

ccarbaugh, 250 single thai lady friends?? how do you keep track of all your lady friends?? and the subject of your life is all about money??? i have been visiting thailand since 1993 and have lived here for the last three years being married for that amount of time. i really must have a wonderful life. we very seldom discuss money, we live a comfortable but not extravagant life and we really dont need for anything. my wifes family has never broached the subject of borrowing or wanting money once during my stay here. if any of my family are in need then my wife and me discuss it and help in any way we can.
there is a lot in life besides talking about money and thank goodness it hasnt happened to me so far and i really dont think it will happen to me. i guess i am one of the lucky ones.............
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Again, Respect

Postby mycrofth on Mon Sep 27, 2010 10:06 am

@sundayjam
Yet, I always hear, "Not have." "can't go" "don't want" or "can't do" Isn't this really just another form of saying no?

Yes, you're right, there are ways to say "no", but they're all more or less rude or respect-less. If you can't read the a-verbal part of the communication and start insisting, you'll be looked upon as impolite and get such an answer. Americans in the UK get into trouble when they use their familiar "woman" instead of the British "lady", and basically they speak the same language. And there's a long list of topics not to be mentioned in polite company there. If you break one of those British taboos, you're looked upon as impolite, and may get paid back similarly. Same in the US, but other taboos, religion, patriotism, and such.
We need to recognize the good and bad of every society. One shouldn't accept the norm simply because its Thai. If it's wrong, it's just wrong.

Wrong compared to what standards? Yours? Why in Thailand?
You can't really demand that 60 million Thais change their way of communication so that you don't appear rude. It doesn't work that way. A little more attentiveness (and less shouting) helps, and, remember, your counterpart may misunderstand you as well. Many Thais don't want to communicate with foreigners because they can't, they don't happen to speak your language (instead they may speak fluent Chinese, Vietnamese, Lao or Khmer), but coercing them to admit that inability is, well, impolite, and may be seen as a confirmation of a bunch of prejudices... Or as a reason for a taxi driver to pretend he did not hear you and speed away.
Thailand has its own bunch of severe political, economic, ecologic problems, but "Thai-ness" surely is none of them. It works pretty well amongst Thais...
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby sillybilly on Mon Sep 27, 2010 1:23 pm

I travel to thailand every month for the last 4 years. Not a long time but enough to recognise that there are flaws in the society and the system in this country just like any other country in this planet, bar none. People who choose to whine about it, i think you have a choice to stay away if you really dislike it in thailand. We all wish this world is a perfect place wherever we go but we know that day wont come. Instead of complaining maybe you have better luck accepting it and adapt. Don't be a hypocrite. If you hate thailand to the bone you would have packed up and leave upon realising it. Admit it, there are other things here you can do that you can't fulfill in your own backyard. Instead of being appreciative of this opportunity you backstab them here, whining like babies.
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby oliversmith on Mon Sep 27, 2010 9:25 pm

Every time I hear "Thai-Style" or Thai-ness is a word for Thai people to explain what foreigners "can't understand". Well most of the time thai ppl can't understand themself: just have a look at the current politic situation.
The word farang is also to me the most racist word that piss me off quickly. I guess I traveled a lot in my life in asia, America, Africa. And thai is one of the very few language I head where they have to discriminate the person they are talking to with that word. Does it matter if the person is white, yellow, black or whatever? In western language making a difference under certain conditions can be seen as a sexism, I bet u can imagine mentioning the race and the sex.
Even after all those still can accept that.
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby kmacfarland on Wed Sep 29, 2010 12:56 pm

This subject seems to be dead for 2 weeks but should be left available for others to read.

BEWARE: most Thais change (improve) their behaviour when foreigners are near. So what you see and hear may not be the real person's true personality.

After 6 years here and running my own business, I have a few things to add.

Thai-ness or "Thai cultural" is often the reason (excuse) given for illogical, silly or un-business like behavior.

I will not try to understand it, just know what I can and connot expect from a Thai.

Kent
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby DynaMaes on Wed Sep 29, 2010 1:09 pm

I’ve been thinking long time about sharing something on this forum… In almost 80 % of the cases I think it’s absolutely a big waste of time discussing this topic with other foreigners… But looking to all these ridiculous posts I thought I would give it another try…

The reasons why foreigners are residing here vary widely. Many, like myself, are running a business here or have a job… Others are on retirement… Some are looking for a girlfriend/wife… And others are maybe hiding for their domestic law/government…

But there is one thing we all have in common… We all moved here in the hope to have a better life, to find happiness, because we could no longer earthen at home or just because Thailand is such a great place to live!

And there is one thing we SHOULD have in common!!! We should respect every culture’s background… We should respect, everywhere in the world, native people their habits and characteristics. How odd or unacceptable they may look in that head of yours. But you have to carry a big load of respect for the people that welcome you in their country… That give you a place to live… That allow you to run a business here (aldo they can make it pretty difficult ;-)) and make money…

As a foreigner I DON’T need to understand Thai-ness!!! Why??? To take the last thing their culture has… To take that little charming piece they carry? There is only one thing that I should do!!! And that simply ADDAPT myself to their Thai-ness… That’s the only way they will allow you to share their Thai-ness… And that would be a great achievement for me already!

And many things I read here that Thai been accused of acting against foreigners are things we do at home against foreigners to! Maybe even more worst! And if that’s not the case than we for sure did that 20 years ago… It’s evolution…

To closure I would like to agree with one thing I unfortunately read here less frequently… If you have a problem with Thai culture, Thai-ness or whatever that breaths Thai… JUST MOVE!!! GO BACK!!! Why are you staying here than! Those people moving back would make life here a lot more pleasant… Than I could approach foreigners without a problem to have a nice chat and not risking to end up in silly discussion like this!

THANKS A LOT!!! ;-)
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby sundayjam on Thu Sep 30, 2010 1:03 pm

It's funny how the definition of Thai-ness changes from one perspective to another. For one, context plays a big role in Thai-ness: business, love, social (fun), political etc. Thai-ness is also very different from a Thai, Asian, American, or European point of view. Many times, we try to cast blame on an others perspective simply because we don't share the same perspective.

Whether one laughs, relishes, or despises a particular element of Thai-ness is a personal thing. I don't think one should leave if they don't like something about Thailand. Thailand is not better than where we came from, it's just different. Somethings are better...others are not.

I take the good with the bad. So? I choose to laugh, cry, rage, enjoy whatever aspect of Thai-ness I choose to. Take it or leave it. Up to you. same, same...mai bpen rai.
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Re: Farang cannot know Thai-ness

Postby ferniaki on Thu Sep 30, 2010 2:30 pm

[quote="DynaMaes"] We all moved here in the hope to have a better life, to find happiness, because we could no longer earthen at home or just because Thailand is such a great place to live!

And there is one thing we SHOULD have in common!!! We should respect every culture’s background… We should respect, everywhere in the world, native people their habits and characteristics. How odd or unacceptable they may look in that head of yours. But you have to carry a big load of respect for the people that welcome you in their country…

As a foreigner I DON’T need to understand Thai-ness!!! Why??? To take the last thing their culture has… To take that little charming piece they carry? There is only one thing that I should do!!! And that simply ADDAPT myself to their Thai-ness… That’s the only way they will allow you to share their Thai-ness… And that would be a great achievement for me already!

[quote="DynaMaes"]


After I've been scanning this topic thoroughly.. well,i have to say that I do agree with 'Khun DynaMaes''s comment above.

Though i am Thai, i do unsderstand of everyone's perspective here, and I do believe that whenever we are, we have to pay respect to native pp.,culture,etc.. And we do have to learn and adapt ourselves in order to live happily...

And when you're here..in Thailand, u have to b optimistic..think more positive with everything around you...
if u are foreigners, for sure u don't need to understand all Thai-ness (even i am Thai, i don't understand Thai-ness entirely...555..it's true!), just look and admitthe way they are....then you will be more happy and enjoy yr life here,
i believe...

This is one of the most interesting debated topics i've ever met, and it's my First time giving comment here!,,,
Thank you na ka...
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