Estimate of Dowry for Girls family

[Rom]

I am a good Thai girl..
To marry to Thai girl you need to have ceremony and dowry ( no dowry it dosn'r mean marriage) for poor family is about 60,000 this is for non eductaed girls nore good job. ( if not she will lose face of whol family and all will gossip)-
2 if she has a degree or good job must be 100,000 up... if she's from the rich family as well can be 200,000 up..
but for 500,000 up if she's a modle or movie star, or Miss Thailand.. or someoen famouse can be one million up...

This is for Thai mem to Thai girls...
for Farang it's up to your brains... but remember to marry must have dawry.. otherwise it's not sacret it's not what the way suppost to be..grils will feel guilty for family..

I suggest Farang to folow this tradition.. but not esagerated (use brain)..
good luck

[Rio]

Rom , Thank you for the valuable information,
When I first visited Thailand some 20 years ago, I thought that marriage is no problem and with little complications. But now I think a proper marriage to a Thai girl will be so difficult to break if one asked for divorce, I mean lot of demands are required from the man .
I know that some farangs simply flee the scene and ignore the consequences. But here we're talking on straight and honest relations.

[Rom@gmail.com]

It's not difficult to divorce a girl as Thai men 80% changed after getting married. It was so romantic before getting married.. then men will drink.. and find other girls as he's has ruin her vergin.. and try someone new. mostly wive will kneel down begging him not to go..(man just left he wants to even if she has kids they don't care.. that's why losts of ladys leave kids with jher parent and go to be prostute because they have now way out) I hate most of Thai girls in this case they don't stand on thire own legs.. some of them still think of having only one husband he he thinks diffrent. some time happen with three girls fighting for one husband (it's discusting) (In Thailand just you sleep with her we can husband already even if not legally biding.) Many of Thais get married without registered as husband and wife.. but dowry is more important.. as least before leaving her he will think how much he's spent before having her.. Prenuptial is only for the ones posses many valueable things. in my area.. people rarely registered and no prenuptial.. they have nothing..

[Lung Paul]

Hi, how are you? From what I understand dowry is asked for because of the loss of income and the loss of support that 'losing' a daughter incurs.

But what if the husband is marrying a rich Thai woman? Why does it cost more? Perhaps because her husband will be marrying a noi princess or marrying into a good family? And why less in the poor families? Because a woman from a poor family is worth less than a wealthy one? I guess so huh?

Sounds as though the practice of dowry payments often turns people into a saleable commodity - is that so in Thai culture?

As a western male I wouldn't want to buy a bride off her family. To me it is almost offensive and seems to encroach on her freedoms as she should be able to make her own decisions - to marry whoever she likes, and not have to wait for the highest bidder. I guess a compromise can always be reached. And if a woman's family are wealthy why do they need more money?

I must say at this point that many average Thais over-estimate the wealth of westerner's - as there are many Thais, particularly in Bangkok who are very. very wealthy by western standards, and who by staying in their own society, can have quite good prospects.

A story... if I met a lovely Thai woman who was poor, when compared with me, then I may gift her family something small - as a symbolic gesture - but I wouldn't want to pay a ransom for her as she is not a prize kwai. And they needn't worry as she would receive all the support and care she could possibly need, and through future visits her family would receive gifts and plenty of support if they wanted to visit or even emigrate to my country.

Arohanui, Lung Paul.

[TK]

'Dowry' is quite common within Asia - it is more of a symbolic gesture (to the bride's family) more than anything else. The 'estimates' given by 'Rom' sounds like the bride is being sold and I guess, that's only the first installment!

[Rooster]

Rom. It is simple. Life and relationship is changing like shifting sand and wave. Yes, it is easy to blame men. But nobody would like to talk about why. Women would hardly ever blame themselves either. The media and social commentators love to sensationalize how men screwed up their wives and girlfriends. However, there are always opposite stories to tell. Women need to avoid the Casanova Affects.

[Rom]

for Thai point of view,the thire daughters are not for sale.. but what it said was is just the way it is... Thai love showing off especially when parents get alot from dawry..(I am Thai girl, I love the way it is that parents should give all the dawry back to a couple to settle thire life together as some regeon said the dawry is the prove that men can earn enought money for dawry , which means he can take care of here and family all thire life, Now thing's not working like that, family take all daq#wy for themself. If men is rich parent expect more..Girls are not for sale obviousely but what i said is really the amounts that people in general.. give the the bride... My sister used to cry alot while hiding and listening our parent negotiated the dawry wit his parent.. it was really like something to sell. she's cried alot.. and they did n't get married becase my parent didn't sattisfied with the dawry.. .. ... You guys can say what ever.. but this is the way it is.....eveyone has thire own ideas.. i have mind...
good luck

[chris]

i agree with you Rom , the dowry is part of the thai culture and must be accepted by other cultures wishing to marry into the thai way.
i was once married to a thai girl and i had to pay a dowry , it was part of my wifes isaan culture and it had to be done .
in england , a traditional white wedding will cost over £5000 and at the end of the day , all youve got is photos but with a thai village wedding , if you give a dowry of 100,000 baht ( was what i gave ) , you are looked upon with great respect by the whole village but most of all your wife .
unfortunately my marriage didnt last but i will always remember that special day in seka,nongkhai and i will never forget my beautiful thai ex-wife .
her family became very greedy and when i complained about buying them a new isuzu truck , they ordered my wife to leave me .

thai girls are brainwashed at birth , they are made to believe that it is their duty to support the elders in the immediate family , i.e. mum and dad .
thats why some thai girls work in barbeers and gogo bars , because they are made to believe that by selling their bodies , they are fulfilling their duties .

[TK]

Rom, as in my earlier posting, I maintained that 'Dowry' is common within Asia and of a symbolic gesture. But the 'estimates' given by you really sounds like the bride is an item for sale! The fact remains that we got it all wrong here! The fact remains that the parents see it as a sale and sadly, the ladies believed that it's their duty to see that their parents get the best out of it. This has been the cause of many unfulfilled and failed marriages (your sister's case included). This dowry and its demands has ruined many potential/sincere relationship (mine is one case).

[John]

No, all wrong!
Everything in on sale in Thailand!
sex, love for sale!
All they needs are $$$