Is it normal to pick up the bride at midnight on the wedding day?

[Andy]

Hi Chanika, thanks for your info!

[Blue Boy]

When after about six months my wife to be and I spoke about a dowry, I agreed on one condition: the 200,000 bahts would be used to buy land in her name for "our" future. OK it is symbolic because I could in theory never see, use or benefit from the land. But all agreed.

Then after having sent the money (from BKK wher we live to...yup, the NE) the price of land began to skyrocket, and I becamse suspicious, to say the least.

After just over amonth I pretty much inistsed to have the money returned and used differently for "our" future.

Good news/bad news. The money was returned to my bank account. Minus 18,000 baht. "Pa had to pay the rice farmers".

Thais need symbols of status, especially the poorer ones. Dowries and cars (4x4 - 4 foor Toyota or Isuzu pickups galore) and big fancy houses. never mind if the dowry s returned next day; if the truck stays parked outside the house 95% of the time, or; if the house has 5 bedrooms for three people. It's all symbolic.

[maniyata]

What wedding jewelry should my bride wear? My bride to be's grandmother has a necklace she really wants her to wear. However she doesn't actually like the necklace her grandmother is offering, and wants to borrow a necklace from my mother (who has offered to lend her jewelry). She is upset about upsetting her grandmother but would prefer not to wear that necklace. (i don't have pictures of any of the necklaces.) Any thoughts?

[stilljustbrowsing]

Might I suggest that you and your bride-to-be go out and choose/buy a necklace yourselves, based on the love you have for each other?
That way no-one can be offended unless they are really so arrogant and stupid that they consider their adornments worn by the bride to be so much more significant than the sincerity of the wedding it'self.

[Oldman]

When I decide that she is the one I would like to share my remaining life with I will not hesitate to walk thousands miles and time will never be an issue to me. Go for her and enjoy your life don’t worry much as what happen to so and so as we always bring in those unfortunate example to be compared and forget thousands and thousands of successful couples . FOLLOW YOUR HEART AND ENGAGE YOUR BRAIN.
GOOD LUCK.

[Just-1-Voice2]

Two years ago when my at that time fiance decided to finally marry, I agreed to buy a house for us, as I planned to retire here. My wife to be had made it clear she was not "looking for a green card" to go to the States, and really wanted a man who was willing to move to Thailand, which fit my plans perfectly. At the time I was 58, she was 48. Both parents dead, so no dowry, which I told her I wouldn't have paid anyway, to which she said was sensible. Our only serious discussion on money was after buying the house I had to return to the States to take care of some things, and told her I could be gone for up to 6 months since I had to deal with the VA. When I came back I found out she had ordered custom made closets for the master bedroom, as well an an entertainment center and other cabinet for the living room & kitchen. The total cost wasn't really all that much, but it upset me that she had done it and just assumed I would pay and wouldn't mind. I paid, but I did mind, and told her that she was never to do anything like that again, and any major purchases would be decided by the two of us. Since then, that's the way it's been. She can come to me with an idea and we'll talk about it. Most of the time I go along with it, as it's something that is beneficial to the house, but a couple of times I've simply told her "no" and that was the end of it.

She also made it clear to her family that while they were welcome to come visit at any time, they were to call first, and that this was not the local "free lunch kitchen". What's somewhat surprising is that family (brother,sister, 100 cousins, etc.) all love me and think I'm the best thing that's every passed through immigration, so go figure.

I consider myself one of the lucky ones, and can only shake my head at those who go into marriages with women half their ages, thinking they're going to find bliss and happiness, and end up finding themselves missing a few thousand baht, or actually dollars in some cases, and then going: "What happened?" When we go into the city of Chiang Mai, my wife and I both laugh at some of the "couples" we see and both know what's going on. That's not to say that there aren't some couples who are happy, and both love one another, but let's face it, those are the exception and definitely not the rule.

[stilljustbrowsing]

J1V, we have already talked this subject to it's death, those that should be reading this are outside doing what they should not.
those reading this either know already or are not Thai orientated.
As such, not only is love blind, but it is crazy as well.
good luck to the near sited fools hey?
follow your heart, if your head takes over, it is not love!
BTW, I would rather have one year of true love than a lifetime of bull s&t.

[Oldman]

It is normal many have done so - Go at any time they have asked you to pick up her as you and her are in love.
Remember those parents who asked you to go at that time to pick up their daughter are confident it s safe for both of you and it may make things easy later in your marriage and this is what all parents are looking forward to their children.
Show them that you trust them (human understanding) so they can trust you and leave all this suspicions to all those who do not have guts to change their life for the better.

Best wishes from Oldman

[stilljustbrowsing]

"I'll meet you at midnight, under the moonlight.." Smokie, good song....