From a Thai Woman to You -- All Farangs

[pamchu]

I myself returned to Thailand, after a 20-year absence for college and professional work. It was after the 'Gold-Rush',the Real-Estate Boom, the Stock-Market Hype and most people felt small compared to those they knew: this guy made Bht50M from land-speculation, that guy got Bht100M+ from stock-inside,etc. My dad felt small too, and tried to get all that I had brought home, by creating 'imaginary land-sale' that I had to come in and bail him out. I didn't, avoiding being robbed blind. Then there were others who demanded Bht30-50M for investing in my factory-project. Bankers were demanding under-table money to extend bank-loans, partners were telling me to buy their industrial-land, government-officers asking Bht50M for investment-privilege, etc. It seemed people felt stupid to let an opportunity for extortion go by. That's what Thailand has become since the last boom 25 years ago.
I once met a courteous bank-teller in the bank's headquarter. Impressed by the service, I asked to buy her dinner after work. She asked to bring her best colleague along, which I didn't mind. When I picked her up at 5, 8 colleagues came along hand-in-hand, much to my surprise. On the way to dinner, she demanded that I drove each and all of them home after dinner. I offered to give them taxi-money, since each lived in different sections of town. No, she threatened to cancel the dinner if I would not promise to drive them all home myself. So, I let them off my car, period.
Thais have lernt to be very opportunistic until they really get slapped.

[pamchu]

I really hate it when people use the term 'Thai Culture' to defend themselves from outsiders. Is copying bad things from the West, such as break-dances, narcotics, loud car-stereos, etc. also Thai culture too? I'd rather prefer the term 'giving, helping out' when needed or as gifts.
I also hate the term 'gratitude' that some bad parents use, in selling their kids to demeaning jobs. Many massage-girls who sent home Bht40K+/month regrettably found out that mom had been gambling big, or dad wasting money like a kid.

[sandy]

Ladywhite..................I think that you are a lovely Thai lady and wish you both all the luck and happiness in the world. You sound like my Yui !

[rswhite]

I am an American who is happily married to a Thai. When we visit the family has never asked for money, and when we travel we each pay our share of the costs. I am sorry that there are ones who do leech from their Farangs, but it is the same in other cultures as well. I know Americans who leech off of their wealthy inlaws, too. I am proud of my Thai spouse and "my" Thai family. They are very loving and accepting of me and appreciate what I do when I visit, such as cleaning the yard and planting trees on the property. I look forward to seeing them next month on our annual visit.

[asloter]

Hello Everyone

From my perspective,I believe many men are in too big of a rush to get married, living so far away from Thailand and busy with work, they don't give enough time dating and to find out what their woman is all about. (Ladies also)find out what your man is all about.
Maybe they are not compatible at all, only meeting a few times in Thailand and talking on the phone and chat is not enough.

They need to live together on and off for at least two years and then decide and not be so desperate for love and marriage.

All im saying for men and women is to know what your getting into so you make the best decision at the time.

There are always those few women that will still use the man to get to USA or wherever to better only herself and their intentions were never to be married at all.

Put each other thru the test before you jump in !

[stancan]

I agree that many of the women are simply doing what needs to be done to survive. I for one am happy to give what I can to my Thai wife and her family. I understood before that it is normal for a western husband to be expected to do so. Nevertheless it troubles me that some have no real love for their men. I don't mind losing my money but it is a much greater pain to lose the heart. Many of us really are looking for love. I have been lucky to find someone who loves me for myself. From that point on I have no problem sharing all that I have.

[johnross]

Wrong.The biggest money hunters I met in Thailand were NOT poor women from rural areas but middle or high class women.
Or students coming from wealthy families but wanting more and more.In fact poor women in Thailand have at least something genuine which middle or high class thai women are lacking.Furthermore ' higher' class thai women have, generally speaking, not much more to offer to ' farangs' than' poor' women in terms of conversation,interests,language skills.they are just more manipulating, more demanding, more bored and boring than they poor counterparts.
Furthermore' higher' class thai women do not speak english better than ' poor' thai women, and they tend to avoid socializing with farang because they know:
1- their english is too poor, and they are ashamed about that.
2-They have generally speaking nothing to talk about.

So, if you want a thai woman ( and my advice is: take a filipina, much much better...) take a poor one, at least she will not want to drive around in a Benz....

[guent]

You are so lucky . 4 years ago I met the love of my life, a beautiful, smart woman from Udonthany, and thought I would never spend a day without her in my life. I also met her family and relatives. But we came under attack in my country, one journey to Thailand would have been accepted, and had to split in love after 16 months. I left my country first for Serbia then for Austria looking for a living there and seeking a way back to her. But our cellphone messages were blocked, the Internet too, and - CAN YOU IMAGINE - I haven't talked to her in 3 years. People in the media have tried to get us back together, but they don't speak to me, just through newspaper articles and songs and horoscopes. I thought she had long changed her number, so when I finally called, her nerves were frayed and she did not pick up. And then again and again, when they finally played the song "Gradually growing into one" I could not figure it out anymore and it took me too long to call. Now the day before yesterday, I am now back in my home country Germany, at 1.00 am she called me, the phone rang twice and missed it on my parents' phone.
I sound so cold now, I guess, writing from the computer, I haven't used it in a while, but still I tell you, all I wish is for her call me again at my parents' number. Then I spilled out all my love and emotion to a newspaper, since she had changed her phone number, hoping they would convey it to her. It blasted all over the Web and angered her, when talk would have healed us. Ladywhite keep your fingers crossed for us, let your love spill over into my life and bring my love back.

[lexybam]

This message has a lot to do with individuality rather than generality. My uncle got married to a Thai woman and their marriage is about 17 years now, yet there is no clash, they are living fine. Despite that we are of American Decent, so i think it is not all Thai women that do that to enrich themselves and their families.

[love101]

Hi Ladywhite!

Thank you for speaking up for Thai women who love farangs truly. Yes, there is such true love between Farangs and Thai women.