From a Thai Woman to You -- All Farangs

[Ladywhite]

I have spent quite a bit of time reading posts on this forum, especially under the topic of "getting married in Thailand."

I am sorry to learn that most of you, farangs, have had negative experiences with your wives' families in terms of money. Most of you here talk about paying a lot of money to support your in-laws. sounds very much like they are leeches that constantly \\ //// every pound or dollar out of your wallets.

I am sorry to learn that thai women marry you for only money for themselves and their families. and only to elevate themselves socially and financially. once they get what they want from you, they walk away from you.

sounds like these thai women give us a bad name.

I do not deny what i learn from your experiences. but i would like you to please not assume that we all Thai women are just like that because we are not.

my impression is that those of you who share your stories here all married to women from villages or rural areas where people are un- or low-educated and very poor. that's why what happened to you happened: she and her families wanted your money. you are viewed as a bucket of gold their daugthers just happen to fall into, so can get as much gold out of the bucket as possible. they do that because they are poor, because they have a golden opportunity, because they can, because you allow them to, and because you love your women.

I believe that there are a lot of thai women who never want to take advantage of you financially, me included. i believe there are a lot of thai women who value love more than money. I am from a very humble background. my family and I never ask for money from my American fiance. If he wants to help us financially, we appreciate that. If not, we continue living without asking. He asked my dad about the dowry he was supposed to give him. he told him he wanted nothing; he did not have me for sale. and let me repeat, my dad is poor and low-educated. we are a poor family who doesn't have a savings account. all my dad wants form him is his love and respect for me.

Again, I am sorry for your bad experience. But for those who are seeking true love with thai women, have faith that you will find one who just doesn't only crave for your money. you just have to look carefully. whether rich or poor, good thai women still exist.

Thank you for reading until thisline. I just felt a need to say something here. I am done now. :)

[Aussie Dave]

Ladywhite..................I think that you are a lovely Thai lady and wish you both all the luck and happiness in the world. You sound like my Yui !

[Lupe Monge]

I think this forum could help me to find a thai friend that I knew in England 10 years ago.
Her name is Panne, I only have her address
56/86 Moo1
Soi Bunsarnorng soi 2 (Off Sukhumyit 119)
Bangmuang Mai, Amphur Muang,
Samutprakarn 10270

The letters that I sent to her, I haven´t having answer.

Maybe some can help me to find her. Many many thanks, Lupe

[Kop]

Thanks you so moch Khun Lady white...

[Lisa]

My mother was a hooker that was how we got to US. I AM NOT ASHAMED OF HER. She was working in a bar and married an American guy for green card 20 something years ago. I do not know what was their agreement. All I know was my mother had no HOPE in Thailand. She worked as waitress ever since we got to US. They bought a house together and sold their first house after a few years. They got divorce after my mother got her citenship and she paid him some money. The second house she bought she made 30,000 after 3 years. The house she has now she bought 10 years ago and she has already paid off the bank.

I have to thank to US. I do not ever want to go back to Thailand which I am ashamed of. Last time my mom took me there, her relatives are nother but money sucker. I am very pround of my mother who works very hard for all her life. I just graduated from college which I got whole finacial aid. And I have a job. Yes, there is racist going on in US. Just like anywhere else on earth. But all I know was US gave me all the knowledge I need to land the job I have now.

[A Farang]

Lisa , you don't need to be grateful to anyone except your mother. She has worked hard and devoted much of her life to to raise you and provide you with better life.
And you don't need to feel bad toward Thailand or Thais, also, you don't need to think or feel you owe something to any farang. You should ONLY be proud of your mother and yourself.
Go on , make your own family and future.
Best Wishes

[chris]

never be ashamed of your mother , she took a way out of poverty , you must not hate your thai relatives either , they see westerners as walking banks but westerners deserve getting ripped off , they flash their money and deserve to get conned

[Lisa]

US gave me a chance. I worked, worked, and worked. Anyone ever lives in US knows that the life is not easy for a single mother with not much education and little girl. We always share our house with strangers (my mom rented out extra rooms we have). BUT WE HAVE A CHANCE. My mother taught me to be thankful. I tried to love the place but I just can not. Once people knows that I am from US with my mother, it is like a sticker stated "a hooker and product of what she hooked" on my face. Last time I was in Thailand, I saw what I supposed to be, a hooker, a prostitute who slept and drank to death. I might not have as much luck as my mom More likely, I would contract HIV and die disgracefully. My stepdad (the American guy my mom married) was the only father figure I know. He knews well what I am BUT he always treated with respect. He was not rich at all. He was a contruction worker. Last time he and his new wife showed up on my college graduation ceremony, he told me how proud he was because he was never smart enough. I told him mom and I were going to Thailand and he told me what a wonderful place Thailand is. After I came back home, I told him how much hatred I have toward Thailand. He told me how much respect he has toward my mom and me. My own people, flash and blood can only think the dirty blood running thru my body.

[Duang Dao]

Dear Lisa,
This is the third writing to you, the last two tries was not posted in this forum. I couldn't pass up the opportunity to praise you for what an outstanding job that your mom had done on raising a fine youn lady like you.

Most Thais are raised to be grateful and respectful to their parents, teachers, bosses and also to a person or place (in your case - the US ) who have done a good deed on your life.

Not surprisingly that you're grateful to this great country. The US had given you and your mom a good life to live and an opportunity to pursue your dreams.

I'm saying this because I feel the same as you. I have lived my life long enough to see that grateful person are always be blessed wtth good health and good fortunes later on in their lives. You're on that path too.
Good luck to your future, Lisa

[bobby]

the bar girl westerner geared entertainment industry seems to have a handbook in that many of the girls have a goal of extracting as much money as possible from the westerner. this may include support for family and for that sick uncle needing the 20000 baht surgery or similar story.
seems the bulk of the westerners are lonely, codependant and may be easy prey. many of the westerners more resemble their respective nation's prison population and don't seem to network with educated thai's. bar girls ARE very easy to conquer. it does not require tact, skill, romance,or wit, but simply a wallet.
Thai people have referred to western geared bar girls as "sumong yun" or mosquito brain. again not their fault as lack of education can do that. despite government loans for university, many simply do not want to study as they perceive the fast cash from entertainment as a better option, albeit a "thinking for today only" mentality.

a friend new to thailand asked me why thai men are not upset with all the farang taking their women. I told him to go to emporium and siam paragon, look around at the distinctly different type of women to be seen there, then return to the soi 7 beer garden, revisit those women, then look around at the men there and ask yourself if they pose a "dating threat" to the upsale women.


have a nice day