What's in a nickname?

What's in a nickname?

Explore the Thai norms of naming with our fun tips

SOCIAL & LIFESTYLE
What's in  a nickname?

Earlier this month, New Zealand Herald reported that Thai students were asked to adopt new nicknames for "smoother cultural integration" in New Zealand. You see, some Thai names and nicknames just sound so unfavourable in English. You know, the likes of Poo, Pee or Porn for instance, for obvious reasons.

No wonder some English-speaking people giggled when I told them my real name.

This got us thinking about the unspoken Thai norms of naming. Every Thai has his/her nickname given by their parents and some adopt aliases given to them by friends. And as they go through life, there come even more naming opportunities. This week, we decided to help you with fun guides for every naming occasion.

Not-awkward-in-English Thai Names

You can't avoid using your name in the English alphabet when travelling by air, booking a hotel, applying for job, studying abroad, so on and so forth. To prevent your name from becoming an accidental joke in English-speaking countries, just follow these steps.

1. Determine whether your name would sound funny in English first. Write out your Thai name with English letters. Separate them into syllables and sound each one out. Google to see if each syllable happens to sound like a dirty word in English. Having a dirty mind may help you identify these words more easily.

2. Try saying your name in English while elongating the vowel sound too as some names like Pichit or Pisit sound so wrong when you pronounce the first 'i' longer than usual.

3. If your names contain poo (as in land or crab), porn (blessing), or tid/tit (as part of Tittiporn or Tidtiporn), you sir are at a high risk of being the laughing stock. Sorry.

4. After you realise that you have at-risk syllables, consider spelling alterations to avoid the obvious comparison first, out of respect to your parents who put care and consideration into naming you. "Pornchai" can be written as "Phonchai", for example. "Poochai" can be spelt as "Bhuchai". This may not always work, though.

5. For super at-risk names such as Tittiporn, Rattaporn and Pornchit, unfortunately, you may want to consider giving yourself a new name altogether. Consult with your local Buddhist monk for some auspicious names while avoiding the sensitive words already mentioned. There are many smartphone applications out there to help you pick good names too. Think of it as a creative activity to reinvent yourself. But please, don't go crazy with a four-syllable first name which incorporates rarely used Thai letters. Please.

6. If you're proud of your Thai name, even if it contains naughty-sounding words in English (or is entirely compose of words borrowed from Pali and Sanskrit), then wear it on your passport proudly. Just be ready to explain the intricate and beautiful meaning of your name to non-Thais. It can be an interesting conversation starter too.

You can introduce yourself by saying: "Hello, I'm Poosit Tittipornpichit. Deal with it!"

Nicknames for Your Future Babies

If you're an expecting parent (or plan to procreate one day), you know how unique Thai nicknames can be these days. It seems all the simple Thai names have been used up so parents have become extra creative. Here are some tips on how to make sure your future baby stands out in class with a name that would cause even teachers to do a double-take.

1. The golden rule is that it can't be one syllable. Gone were days when nicknames could be that simple, peeps. Som, Daeng, Moo, Nok are soooo Gen X.

2. To lend automatic adorableness to your kids, just stick with Japanese words. "Hana, how's school today?", "Kendo, let's go to the mall.", "Shogun, show mama how you dance!" or "Gundam, come play Gundam with your dad!" It doesn't matter whether you have Japanese blood in your lineage or not.

3. Generic fruit names are acceptable so long as you add some sort of adjective. "Som" (orange) is too plain. Your kid could go by "Som Jeed" (zesty orange), "Som Zaa" (fizzy orange) or "Som Priew" (sour orange).

4. Western dessert names are go-to options for female nicknames as well. Your daughter's name could be Cheesecake, Pancake, Brownie, Doughnut or Cupcake. How fun (and delicious)!

5. If you plan to have more than one kid, make sure all of your kids' nicknames are related in some way. For instance, your first son could be Title, and your second could be Titan.

6. Nicknaming your kids with proper names can earn them either instant recognition or a lifetime of undue pressure and mockery. A boy nicknamed Google may feel like he'd have to top the class all the time, as he is supposed to be as omniscient as the search engine. What if your son Lego wanted to grow up to become a painter and not an engineer? Nong iPhone may struggle with feelings of never being good enough since there would always be a better versioned iPhone coming out. Great nicknames (may) come with great responsibilities.

Your Celeb Names

Whether you aspire to be an actor, singer, a model or a high-ranking officer, know that one day people will start to refer to you with a different name. Prepare for it in advance because you'll never know when you make it big and famous.

1. Make sure you're a celeb first. This can be easily proven by taking a stroll in Siam. If no one stops you and asks for a selfie with you, then you aren't there yet. The other way to tell if you're a celeb or not is too see if the likes you got on your Facebook and IG are shown in three-digit numbers, and not names.

2. It's very easy to formulate your dara name. It usually consists of your nickname and your first name. If your full name is Poopoom "Ken" Pongpanu, then your celeb name is Ken Poopoom. Davika "Mai" Horne becomes Mai Davika. It's that easy.

3. If you want to be the host of a famous show one day, be ready to adopt the nickname-and-show-name combo, for example, Pompam Toey Tiew Thai. Sometimes people will refer to you with the most recognised role you've done in show biz, for example, DJ Nui, VJ Ja and DJ Poom.

4. If you belong to the subgroup of music bands under the celebrity umbrella, your naming formula is "your nickname" followed by "your band name". The examples are Toon Bodyslam, Pod Moderndog and Pup Potato.

5. If you're a high-ranking officer, your nickname will be preceded with the word "Big". Our PM Prayut Chan-o-cha is also known as "Big Tu". His younger brother Gen Preecha's moniker is "Big Tik". Wouldn't it be funny if your nickname was C, Ben, Boy or Dick?

Naming Your Band

Besides catchy tunes, you also need a name for your band that will turn heads too.

1. Spell your band name in English. Make sure it causes people to go "What!?" and grabs their attention. If they don't remember your name, how will they start listening to your songs, right?

2. It doesn't have to make sense at first but have to make your potential fans curious. Take cues from Big Ass (people may wonder if you have big rears), Naked Astronaught (are you playing in your birthday suit?), The White Wedding Dress (are you performing in bridal gowns?), The Pink Dolphin (?), X0809 (??) or Yellow Fang (because, why wouldn't you be curious about a band with such a name?).

3. Another approach is combining words of different languages. For example, Getsunova combines getsu, moon for Japanese, and nova, which refers to supernova, to mean exploded moon.

4. Having a little story behind your band name is always a good idea too. Rock band Lomosonic got its name in a hurry. They were originally called Lomo but came up with their current name to avoid trademark infringement. POLYCAT got the first part of their name off a synthesiser and the second part is from the animal they love.

Naming Your Own Venue

You finally save up (or ask your parents to give you) enough money to open an eatery of your own. Now it's time to come up with a name for your place that will pique your customers' curiosity and appetite. Try the witty wordsmith approach in naming your own venue.

1. The real-life examples we've spotted include portmanteau names such as Fattory, Foodtory, Farmily and Eatdustry. Quite cool, eh?

2. The alliteration technique often produces easy to remember names such as Beast Burger, Buddha Belly, Koguma Kafe, Mix & Munch and Mad Moa.

3. Try to work in the type of food you highlight in your name if you can. That way people will know instantly what can be expected from you. Examples include Panini Mafia and Spaghetti Factory.

4. Everything sounds so much better in French. "Casa Lapin" is just fancy way to say "the house of rabbits". In any case, don't forget what matters most is the quality of food you're serving.

Is your foreign name funny to Thais?

Your Thai friends may already be confused by the pronunciation of your name, as some of these names don't always correspond with the spelling. How are we supposed to know that Graeme isn't pronounced "grae-me"?

Anywho, if your name or surname contains the following words, your Thai friends may giggle, and understandably so. The at-risk words include: Dawson, Hamzah, Tudgay, Hazard and Ruby.

We'd prefer not to explain why they sounds so unruly in Thai, for the sake of good relations between Thailand and other countries.

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