2016 has been full of ups and downs, highs and lows. It has, without a doubt, been an interesting year to say the least. So we can't help but wonder what 2017 has in store for us. Will Trump stick to his policies? Who knows. Will there be another car-related Thai hi-so drama for the public to scrutinise? Most likely. What is certain for Bangkokians though, is that our city will continue to change its landscape. Sadly, we think it may be for the worse, seeing as the new Bangkok governor's agenda includes projects to remove street vendors from Silom, Siam Square and Pratunam.
Apparently we don't have enough condominiums, shopping malls and office buildings because they just can't stop building these damn things. And in the process of doing so, they are chasing out small vendors, stalls, shops and communities which have been around for decades.
As we witness culture and traditions being erased for profit, we can't help but think about the little kooky quirks of the Big Mango that we hold dear to our hearts. So without further ado, dear readers, here are 10 elements that make a typical Bangkokian Soi anything but boring.
THE TAXI UNCLES
You can spot these older blokes easily as they're the ones yelling "taxi" at tourists and completely ignoring the locals. They hang out in groups of three or four, high in spirits (literally, sometimes), all with their shirts lifted up showing off their beer bellies and their impressive collection of amulets. Yes, because that's exactly what we want to see first thing in the morning and probably why Grab Taxi and Uber are doing so well over here.
THE 7-ELEVENS
The freezing breeze blasting from the air conditioners alone is enough to invite you in. Let's face it, you're not really in there to buy their crappy attempt at sandwiches. You're there to browse your way through literally every item you would ever need in your life while drying off your sweat patches before heading back to work -- and possibly feed a stray dog too. Why do we need 10 of these in one soi, you ask? We're still trying to figure out that one too.
THE FOOD STALLS
Come on, what really made Thai food famous -- and caused millions of tourists to travel to Thailand -- is the street food. Sure, now there's some really fantastic modern Thai restaurant in a fine-dining setting that's definitely worth your money, but you can bet your bottom baht that even chefs at these institutional places would still like to indulge daily at the roadside food stalls. From kuay tiew, moo ping, som tam, to hoi tod -- or even the all-too familiar phad thai you can find these original 'pop-ups' with their bright umbrellas, plastic stools and pink tissues lined up from morning 'til night just beckoning you over with their thick, wonderful black fumes that leave you smelling like a walking smokehouse. Sorry, but, we're not quite ready to give these up for a bunch of mini-marts and condominiums.
THE FIXERS
Broken shoes? Buttons come loose? Trousers too long? These aunties and uncles may operate on a simple wooden table equipped with either a sewing machine or a hammer in the middle of the footpath, but they'll get anything you need fixing... well, fixed. Living in Bangkok means ruining a few items of your clothing. Think about it; straddling over the motorsai every single day is going to leave a hole in your trousers somewhere, and when that happens... who you gonna call?
THE "BARS"
Is it a Volkswagen van? Is it a bar? Yep, it's a bit of both. We're seeing less and less of these now as a direct result of this clean-up initiative, but we've always liked their casual vibe and cheap disco balls. It's always good fun drinking out of a van-cum-bar, nodding your head along to the molam-remixed versions of Western pop music while anticipating what happens after a group of tourist orders a bucket from one of these places.
THE LUCKY ONES
So we might not have (legal) casinos here. Well, who needs one when you have people literally bringing your lucky numbers to you? Alright, sure, you might have to wait a few days to find out the result in a newspaper and you may have to interpret the latest dream you had and turn it into a lucky number, but, that's the fun of it right? Ahh, the Bangkokian's life; when we're not eagerly waiting for the long weekends to arrive, we're praying for the day the lottery sellers turn us into millionaires.
THE DISC JOCKEYS
You get off the BTS station after a long day at work and you're immediately met with a myriad of bright colours emitted from stacks of fake DVDs and CDs. Other people may have to wait six months for the real deal, but you? Fifteen minutes while the sellers make their runs to the place that hides their secret stash, and you're good to go. Blue-ray quality? You betcha. Solid return policy? Maybe not.
THE CAFFEINE CARTS
Or should we say the diabetes-inducing stall? Coffee and tea here is not complete without five spoons of sugar and a slug of evaporated milk. Any mention of words like "less sweet" or "no sugar" would only result in the vendors looking at you like you've just thrown up on a baby. Sickly sweet in this sweltering city heat? We love it.
THE MOTORSAI GUYS
It's nearly impossible to imagine a life in Bangkok without these bright vest-wearing riders. How else are we supposed to get to the BTS stations from our 35sqm condos tucked right in the back of the soi? Walk? Don't be silly.
THE WOBBLY TILES
You'll never fully appreciate streets in places like Sydney or Singapore until you've walked in our soi and along one of our so-called "footpaths". It feels like you're constantly playing a game that combines Temple Run and Minesweeper together, with the ultimate goal being to make it to the end without a broken ankle or your legs covered in that putrid liquid. Constantly avoiding the wobbly tiles, potholes, encroaching trees, vendors taking up half of the walking space -- Oh, the charms of living in Bangkok.
