The new politics of desire

News > Investigative Report

Sexuality meets globalisation _ Thais are getting involved in more international relationships but the dynamics are changing

Published: 21/08/2011 at 04:18 AM
Newspaper section: Spectrum

The face of Thai sexuality is changing in small fault lines that may soon represent a seismic shift in the way the Land of Smiles is viewed.

TOKYO DRIFT: A play, ‘Water Time’, portrays a cross-cultural Thai-Japanese romance.

While the perception of international relationships here in some Western eyes may be of older, overweight, oversexed tourists trawling bars for Thai partners, the post-Vietnam era cliche of American servicemen on R&R is being challenged by and is also accelerating new trends.

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About the author

: Writer: Ezra Kyrill Erker; Position: Writer

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chazthai
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Discussion 20 : 22/08/2011 at 08:50 AM20
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In the photo of the "bar girls" accompanying this article; what in the name of decency is that little girl doing in such a place? Does no one care?
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denton
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Discussion 19 : 21/08/2011 at 10:54 PM19
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Er, I am not middle aged and fat. My thai wife and I both have university degrees. She had a good job in Thailand before. We are of similar age. She is not from Isaan, is not really interested in prestige and money and oh... we did not met in a bar, she has never worked in the sex industry, we both have Thai and Farang friends... We don't like to go to tourist areas. We have never had any problems in Thailand.

Really... isn't it time we let go of the old perceptions and bullshit. Myself and my beautiful wife won't fit into your idea, I am sorry. Please write more sensible articles.
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seektruth
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Discussion 18 : 21/08/2011 at 10:31 PM18
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The shallowness of some people is apparent here is they will actually come out and say that they base some of their attractions on movies. That is so immature. Falling in love with movie stereotypes is about the same as falling in love with a Disney fairy tale cartoon movie character. For example many Japanese men are known to be chauvinistic and have rather peculiar/dubious sexual preferences. So as with any person, once marriage happens the bubble will burst and reality hits.
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OldThaiHand
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Discussion 17 : 21/08/2011 at 09:20 PM17
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The obsession with white-skinned Korean and Japanese men is not just about skin. At least in appearance these men are quite androgynous, bordering on girlish, and therefore perceived as less threatening.

In the movie 'Twilight' all Thai women are attracted to the pale-skinned, wispy, asexual vampire, Edward over the muscular he-man werwolf, Jacob.

Interestingly, western women I have asked think Edward's a wimp and are only attracted to Jacob because he's a "real man". They also feel that most Asian men are simply not masculine enough.
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observer 101
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Discussion 16 : 21/08/2011 at 06:04 PM16
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# 7 Excellent point.

I have known Thai women that are Korea/Japan obsessed. One such gal was the sister of a female attorney friend. She had some success meeting Korean guys but no success in keeping them because as her sister put it " Korean culture places high importance on punctuality, reliability, and organization. The gal was a white skin Thai but as my Japanese friends (male and female) put it, "you lose interest easily in low reliability, and low punctuality people.
I have some Thai friends that are super punctual, organized and reliable but seem to be the exception.
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englishbob
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Discussion 15 : 21/08/2011 at 06:00 PM15
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Two points become apparent in this article and subsequent posts...

1) An increasing number of Thai women are drawn to foreigners rather than Thai men
And
2) Many Western men feel unwelcome in Thailand due to regulations and restrictions placed upon them.
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steveyinasia
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Discussion 14 : 21/08/2011 at 01:31 PM14
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I wonder if the "white Asian" will be subjected the the same amount of xenophobia and double pricing schemes
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myopinion
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Discussion 13 : 21/08/2011 at 01:04 PM13
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Sadly it is true what many here saw in this article - status is everything for most Thais.
I came to this country at the tender age of 25 - had a few "relationships" of which one lasted 8 years. For many years I always had the feeling in the back of my head that I was being used to provide a good life.
At the end the relationships ended because of the status thinking of my Thai partners - as I got older I was dumped by my ex boyfriend of 8 years for a younger Thai one.

Already almost given up hope - and I was really at an absolute down point in my life. I ran into a young Thai man who invited me for a drink - we got to know each other - acctually he was not really my "type"- but he was aware I did not have much at this point in my life and he did not care and he stayed with me and we shared what little we had.

Realizing that I had by pure luck found somebody who had really fallen in love with me - my life changed and from that point on things just turned all positive. I realized that I had been chasing a dream of the "ideal" partner.
Now 11 years later we are still going strong - the love he gives me has changed my life for the better - and has paid of for him - he now lives in a 10 million Baht 600 sm2 house - drives a car for 2 million - and his family is taken care of. Needles to say that two of my ex's tried to win me back - they are very good looking and as shallow as people can be - I would not trade my partner for the most handsome man in the world.It's not the looks or status that counts in a relationship - it's character and personality!
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franklin
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Discussion 12 : 21/08/2011 at 12:59 PM12
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What I never understood was how a foreign man could be willing to marry a Thai lady with the intent of living in Thailand, and raising a family when he has absolutely no rights whatsoever and no legal recourse should problems occur. All Thai laws are designed to make his stay challenging to difficult, not easy. Should an unscrupulous cop file bogus charges against him, he’s outa’ here or huge sums of money must change hands. Period. Test the waters before taking the plunge.
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Ian Wensor
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Discussion 11 : 21/08/2011 at 12:50 PM11
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drsmith disc 9... Since coming to Thailand I've realised that love here has a completely different meaning to Thai women... To them, it's not about moonlight, roses and all the romance one expects to go with it but rather a case of ... "HOW RICH ARE YOU, HOW MANY BAHT YOU BLOODY GOT - EH"?
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