Last month, taxpayers wrote a cheque for 3.3 billion baht when Russia delivered two VIP long-range Sukhoi Superjet 100s. The junta tried to claim they were "transport planes", because carrying important people and their aides is transport, right?
The Sukhoi 100-LRs are kitted out in a splendid, three-class, VIP arrangement. They include a section for two VIPs and their Significant Others, another for six close, personal aides, and a 50-seat area for other ranks. In other words, the Royal Thai Armed Forces already own two planes, each of which is outfitted specifically for trips like Gen Prawit's. Caviar and eggs Benedict are available from the Thai Airways International Kitchen.
The distance from Bangkok to Honolulu is 10,600km, so the Sukhoi would have to stop to refuel. The problem this presents is not immediately obvious. Gen Prawit's defenders point out the 747 flew non-stop to Hickam Air Force Base, and while he pointed to this marvellous new robe of the emperor, no one seemed capable of concluding, "so what?"
It is horrid that the Minister of Defence took 38 aides and a chartered 747 to a meaningless ceremony in America, where the most strenuous work and top accomplishment was standing up and smiling for a photo with US Defence Secretary Ash Carter. It is horrid none of these people have heard of Skype.
But last week was one of true horridness.
Horridness was the Office of the Attorney-General running to side with the defence minister, even though the OAG has absolutely no dog in the Hawaii-gate fight. No one even suggested Gen Prawit broke the law, so what reason could the OAG cite for protecting him -- without a shred of evidence, except horridness?
Horridness is the National Anti-Corruption Commission writing a secret decision to end its investigation of the prime minister's brother in a case where Gen Preecha openly bragged of nepotism for his son.
Horridness is kowtowing. In October 2016, the prime minister of Thailand boasted he had not simply paid tribute to Beijing, but had repeatedly given them permission to operate on Thai soil, as if Thailand were part of China. Which, maybe it is.
It was on Wednesday, and it was all about a skinny Hong Kong schoolboy with weird glasses and an atrocious haircut having a Tiananmen Tank Man moment, only in Bangkok. Joshua Wong, who also terrifies the entire Central Committee and armed forces of the People's Republic of China, turned the knees of the Thai junta to jelly.
Said Prime Minister Prayut Chan-o-cha: "It was not a deportation. It was a stopover flight and Chinese authorities just took him away. It was China's reason, so let China handle its own affairs."
On Thai soil.
Horridness is the Ministry of Truth, which started official operations on Oct 1. That is the day the newly promoted handsome celebrity junta spokesman Lt Gen Sansern Kaewkamnerd became the head of all propaganda in the country.
Being a celebrity spokesman has been a good gig for Lt Gen Sansern, who rose from being the colonel defending military killings in the 2010 battles with red shirts. Now he had to defend the secret detention of a teenager so feared by his four-star bosses they had to call in China to handle the dirtiest part of the work.
And Lt Gen Sansern showed the regime's spirit by turning out the weirdest mess of gobbledygook in the history of the Public Relations Department, his new home base.
We'll get to it quickly, but consider this as background. The Education Ministry just two weeks ago announced its latest and spiffiest new system for teaching and assessing English-language ability. It will require Mathayom 3 students to parse sentences, and my goodness do we look forward to meeting, greeting and bowing to the 15-year-old who can diagram this sentence by the Minister of Truth.
"The government spokesman further commented that, the NCPO was aware that Mr Wong had been active in resistance movements against other foreign governments, and that if such actions were taken within Thailand, they could eventually affect Thailand's relations with other nations, particularly since governments worldwide seldom allow such individuals or movements to use its own territory to engage in activity that may cause political instability in another country."
Horridness is digging up tired old regulations written by dictators past to prove that government nepotism and retaliation and flaunting power and ostentatious spending are "legal" and "common practice", rather than acceptable, moral and correct. While the government claims not to know the difference between "technically legal" and legitimate, 65 million people do.