Who doesn't like a new Facebook update, right? You may already have experienced a new feature which displays exchanges you have with friends on a post in a new pop-up tab similar to the one that appears at the bottom of your screen when you send messages to friends. Now, I like new Facebook tricks as much as the next guy but I think this new feature could irk some people too. You don't want too many tabs cluttering up your already busy news feed, do you?
This got me thinking about Facebook features that could be beneficial to us Thai users, so I've come up with some suggestions of my own. Let's share this and wait for Mark Zuckerberg to heed our call.
1. Localised Reactions
I know, I know. We already have six reactions but don't you think the reaction tab could be extended to include more Thai-specific ones so we can express ourselves more authentically.
There should be a jai yen yen icon in the form of a heart made of ice or a fan to console your friends who rant about a manud pa or say that they're having a really bad day at the office. A drooling smiley should exist so people can properly respond to a picture of delicious som tum. A sathu icon in the form of a prayer should be available when you want to appreciate someone for the good deeds they have done. An "awww" reaction should be made real because you simply cannot respond to a video of a baby bulldog successfully climbing up the stairs with a mere like or love.
Last but not least, a sawasdee icon should be made real too so you can greet someone when they do a Facebook live. You know how hard it is to type sawasdee krub/ka in Thai?
2. Traffic Forecasting
This feature will be useful for Bangkokians as we have to factor in the traffic for everything we do. Facebook should be greeting us first thing every weekday morning with the estimated time we'll have to spend on the road to get to work. It could be like "Good morning, Somchai. It'll take you three hours in your car to reach your office. Road rage is expected. Stay cool." Later on in the same day, it could be like "Somchai, you're going to be late to an event. Better hop on a morsai taxi ASAP." with a function to show you the nearest queue.
3. Honest Responses
Sometimes we click on certain buttons when we don't really mean the things said on the buttons. For example, there are the options of "Interested", "Going" and "Not Interested" on every event page. The event organisers could really use a function to reveal the honest thoughts behind those button clicks because "Interested" can mean "There's a pretty good chance I'm going" or " I'm just looking around because I don't want to miss out on anything" and "I clicked this because I want to appear like I have things to do on the weekends".
4. Lakorn Live
Wanna know how to make Facebook even more addictive for Thais than it already is? Stream soap operas and popular TV shows in their entirety on Facebook. Lakorns are perhaps one of the few reasons Thais get off Facebook, only to find themselves glued to an even bigger screen. Khun Mark, bring lakorn to them and they'll never leave Facebook. Also, just imagine how feisty the comment exchanges between viewers on an episode of The Face Thailand could be.
5. Cute Bombs
With weekly online dramas, Omsin's death and the limbo state of Thai politics on every news feed, one could use a lift-me-up every now and then. Therefore, I propose there should be a button to release a burst of corgis all over your screen, just like when you react to a post with love reaction but ten times bigger. It doesn't have to be a corgi. A baby elephant would do.
6. Wan Phra Reminder
Wan Phra, or Buddhist Holy Day, takes place four times a month. Remind people of these days with a cute yet respectful graphic of the Lord Buddha. This could potentially inspire Thais to be kind while interacting with each other on Facebook.
7. Nearby Police Checkpoints
Facebook already has a function to tell us when a Facebook friend is near. It wouldn't be too much of a stretch for them to figure out how to alert Thai users when they are approaching a police checkpoint, would it? This should come in very handy for Bangkokians on the weekends. #justkidding.