When I first heard a member of the Girly Berry pop group was arrested for driving under the influence, my heart skipped a beat. Was it Giftzy, Vanida Termtanaporn, the hot one?
When I found out it was Giftza, Piya Pongkulapa, the less-hot one, I breathed a sigh of relief. True, I'm biased towards hotness. That's why I like the prime minister, and in a girl group where neither member can sing nor dance, hotness is the only measurement of likeability.
Carrying on with last Sunday's theme of the rich and fabulous getting away with (alleged) crimes due to the deeply entrenched patronage system which grants privileges and upholds connections, today we examine the role of the men in brown.
On Tuesday at 1:45am, the 28-year-old pop singer's vehicle was stopped at a traffic checkpoint on Phatthanakan Road. According to the police, she initially refused to blow into a breathalyzer and said that she's ''a celebrity and knows many senior police officials''.
Later, another car arrived at the checkpoint with two men said to be her friends. They got out, ranted and raved at the police and the press who had gathered there _ bratty, belligerent drunken boys trying to save a damsel in drunken distress from the men in brown in the hope that she might put in a good word for them with Giftzy, the really hot one.
What makes such behaviour normal and commonplace _ and often successful _ is the cooperative attitude of the police themselves. Watch the video of the scene and you will spot the following:
Ranting and raving fools, with the police politely, meekly trying to calm them down, but failing to do so _ until the fools themselves run out of breath.
When questioned if some senior official had phoned the officer in charge of the checkpoint in order to get the pop singer a pass, the police officer says yes, and that this is the norm. So having your authority as an enforcer of the law and your ability to perform your duty undermined by your superior is the norm.
The pop singer refused to take a breathalyzer, insisting that the police give her time to rest and drink lots of water so that she can pass the test. The logic (or lack thereof) of her thinking should prove that she was indeed drunk, completely insane or hopelessly brainwashed by the privileges of patronage.
This attitude of the less-hot member of Girly Berry is like a drug dealer telling the arresting officer: ''Hold on, let me hide this bag of cocaine in the bush, and then you can frisk me. Because, you know, if you frisk me now, you'd find cocaine.''
The stinker is that the policeman was OK with it, because it was supposedly standard procedure. Hours later, she failed the breathalyzer anyway. That's how drunk she was.
I actually felt sorry for the officer in charge of the checkpoint _ looking tired and uncomfortable with tape recorders and microphones jammed in his face _ I really did. To have a badge, a uniform and a pistol, to be the law, but yet to have so little power to enforce the law, getting pushed around by young punks _ all this and worse for just 6,000 baht a month.
It is of little wonder that the law in Thailand is so impotent and disrespected, that some people think they can get away with anything. Of course, this isn't always the case, but usually is when the police have to deal with someone who ''might know someone''.
Such is the way the system works that I know an Aussie who had a Royal Thai Police sticker on the window of his car. I'm certain he's not a Royal Thai Police officer, but the sticker served a purpose, to plant the notion that this farang might actually know somebody.
The police must establish authority and control the situation, not be pushed around by some punk kids who might know somebody _ isn't that the way it should be?
I've been stopped twice at police checkpoints. Both times, I offered no argument and didn't tell them who my daddy was. I just blew dutifully and passed both times. This is because I grew up in the great state of Texas where I learned to fear the police, especially as a brown boy who speaks English with an accent.
I know the procedure. I watched the TV show Cops. I always hear the theme song in my head when approached by the police, ''Bad boys, bad boys/what you gonna do/what you gonna do when they come for you''. I've seen the footage of the Rodney King beat-down.
One night, rolling down the street, rap music blasting, a friend in the driver's seat, we were pulled over. The driver argued with the cop. He refused to turn the music down. I know how it would have gone down if a cool head had not prevailed. I turned and saw another cop standing behind the car, eyes fixed on us, one hand on his pistol holster; standard procedure. My dumb friend continued to argue belligerently. The officer talking to him demanded that he step out of the car; standard procedure. He refused; the officer's hand went to his holster; standard procedure.
I turned the music off and told the idiot to shut the chocolate fudge up, get out of the car and talk to the kind officer nicely; standard procedure from the guidebook ''How to Avoid a Police Beat-Down If You're not White in America''. In the end we were let go with a warning to keep within the speed limits and to keep the rap music down. Texas state police do not like rap music, should have had on some Garth Brooks.
Now if those belligerent brats had launched a tirade against police officers in the great state of Texas, they would have been handcuffed for attempting to obstruct justice; perhaps tasered if they resisted.
If Girly Berry Giftza had told them she needed a rest and three bottles of water before taking the breathalyzer test, they would have booked her just for saying such a stupid thing.
The ''do you know who my daddy is'' shenanigans would have only a small chance of success. This is because while the patronage system exists everywhere, it's a norm over here, but an exception over there. In fact, the Texas cops might well be more eager to bust you, because to bust a ''somebody'' could make a career, maybe earn an appearance on The Jerry Springer Show. The possibilities are endless.
So I've learned to respect the authority of the police. Those kids have not. Why? Not just because if you actually know ''somebody'', you might not feel the need to respect the police. The police themselves don't establish their own authority if they think you might know somebody. And while Giftza didn't get away with it, perhaps because the press was there, countless others have and will continue to.
The point here is not that the pop singer was finally booked, albeit not before a long circus. The point is the police did not establish authority and control the situation as enforcers of the law should. I'm sure they would prefer to actually have authority and control, so I felt sorry for them. Their own superiors undermine them. The patronage culture renders them near impotent. The young punks (and old punks) abuse and make a mockery of them.
This is not to say the Thai police should be hardcore like Texas police. There's a fine line between the two extremes. Find that line and stand firm on it. But Thai law is built on weak foundations because the society too is weak, always zigzagging on shaky ground.
Take an individual who knows somebody or is a bona fide somebody, and magnify it into a group of people _ this explains why people believe they can storm Government House, take over an airport, invade a hotel, occupy a district and burn down buildings with impunity. And why not, the authorities themselves like to roll tanks into the streets.
It's not just the rich and fabulous who believe they can get away with flaunting the law, but also the downtrodden, when in sufficient numbers and headed by the rich and fabulous. Meanwhile, those in uniforms continue to get pushed around and undermined by their superiors.
It is then of little wonder that many in those same uniforms also commit crimes and believe they can get away with it. It is of even less wonder that the ones arrested and imprisoned, punished and suffering in perpetual mediocrity for all of this individual and group irresponsibility and unaccountability are every member of Thai society itself.
Contact Voranai Vanijaka via email at voranaiv@bangkokpost.co.th.