It was intriguing to see that the Thai embassy in Tokyo has published a 10-point manners guide for Thai tourists in Japan. Apparently the behaviour by some tourists is frowned upon by the Japanese, known for their good manners.
I’ve always regarded the Thais as quite polite, although it is conceivable they might get a bit loud in large groups when abroad, especially at feeding time. Unnecessary noise was one of the main points raised by the embassy. This is obviously a bit tricky for Thais, coming from a kingdom where it is almost impossible to escape from intrusive sounds, whether it be wretched whistle blowers, salesgirls babbling away on microphones or loudspeakers where they don’t belong.
Admittedly, you expect a bit of a racket in a city like Bangkok and it would seem a very strange place if it were silent.
Standing in line
Another point raised by the embassy was that quaint custom of queuing. When I was first in Thailand, there was a joke that few Thais even knew what the word “queue” meant.
When a popular film was showing in a Bangkok cinema everyone seemed intent on getting tickets at the same time, prompting predictable scenes of indescribable mayhem. Over the years things have improved considerably, especially with the introduction of electronic numbers in places like banks, embassies and government offices.
But even so, it would be fair to say that the Thai interpretation of the word “queue” is at best “flexible”, while many people still seem to think you join a queue at the front.
Simply etiquette, old boy!
Coming from England I have considerable experience of queuing. In fact, queue etiquette was an essential, if unwritten, part of one’s upbringing.
A recent survey revealed an English person averages a total of four days a year standing in a queue. When you consider the average “influential person" in Thailand might spend four seconds a year in a queue, probably less, it indicates that quite a cultural gap still has to be overcome.
George Mikes, the Hungarian-born British writer, summed it up succinctly when he observed: “An Englishman, even if he is alone, forms an orderly queue of one.”
The foot soldiers
Another point from the Thai embassy was “Drivers must mind the right of pedestrians and stop their cars at zebra crossings and wait … with patience without honking the horns.”
Now this might be a trickier one to resolve than queuing for the Thais who drive in Japan. As is all too clear, we have the absurd situation in Bangkok in which pedestrian crossings are amongst the most dangerous spots to attempt to traverse the road. In fact, they are totally ignored by motorists.
The crossings are particularly hazardous for tourists, luring them into a false sense of security. Official announcements that if you get hit on a crossing it’s the motorist’s fault and you can sue them are not particularly reassuring.
Beep, beep!
I was a little surprised to see the “honking of horns” mentioned in the Thai embassy report.
Despite the frustration of sitting in endless jams, I’ve always thought Bangkok motorists displayed remarkable restraint when it came to using horns. It is a bit different on the provincial highways of course, with buses and trucks not reluctant to give a blast on their klaxons, a not very polite way of saying “get out the way!”
The worst place I’ve experienced in Asia for unnecessary horn honking and just plain bad driving is China. I recall after my first visit to China in the 1990s I vowed to never complain about the standard of driving in Thailand ever again. Well, not for a couple of weeks anyway.
There were a lot of road safety signs in China and it didn’t take long to discover why. The standard highway procedure appeared to be to overtake on blind corners and if something suddenly appears coming at you head-on, just blast the horn and they will go away. It’s simple really.
Heads in the sand
Tourists are not averse to having a whinge themselves. A few years ago the Association of British Travel Agents compiled a list of the most ridiculous complaints from British tourists abroad. After reading them you get the feeling some people should never be let out of their own country.
One complaint was that the beach was “too sandy”. They should have gone to Brighton. Another family complained that in the brochure the beach was yellow, but in reality the sand was white and they demanded an explanation. Someone else complained the sand was “too hot”.
The beaches certainly have a lot to answer for. One woman claimed her holiday was ruined because her husband spent all the time ogling topless young ladies parading along the beach.
Even the sea came in for criticism. One mother complained: “No one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled.”
Spanish inquisition
British tourists in Spain are perhaps the biggest whingers. One English visitor demanded that the traditional siesta be banned because she couldn’t find any shops open in the afternoon. Certainly, those locals have a lot to answer for. One irate Brit tourist on the Spanish Riviera complained: “There are too many Spanish people.” Goodness, what the tourists have to put up with these days.
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