WE CARE

An age of neglect

There are over 20,000 homeless elderly in Thailand. The Bethany Home and Wat Nhong Hoi Age-Care Centre in Ratchaburi province are just two old folks' homes which try to give the elderly poor a place to call home

Bussarawan Teerawichitchainan

It's almost noon. Lunch has already been served in the canteen at the Bethany Home, an age-care centre located in Ban Pong, Ratchaburi province.

Grandma Samniang Harirak, 77, is on duty. Entering the canteen, she manoeuvres her friend's wheelchair to the table where other senior residents were sitting.

Each day before lunch, the old lady usually leads her "elder sisters" to the dining table and sometimes helps feed them.

"I love to serve others. I want to be helpful while I still can," she says with a smile.

Grandma Samniang moved to the Bethany Home nearly seven years ago, after the death of her husband.

"I felt useless and lonely with my children's family. They were too busy pursuing their careers. They rarely had time for me," she explained.

However, at the Bethany Home Grandma Samniang has found friends and, more importantly, a feeling of usefulness. The home's warm and friendly atmosphere makes her feel much better.

"The staff treat me like I'm their grandmother or an elderly relative. I also get the chance to chat with people of a similar age and attitude," the old woman said.

Established in 1987 by a group of Catholic nuns, the Bethany Home's philosophy is to provide shelter with a cosy and friendly environment for the elderly free of charge.

According to Sister Sirirat Sriviroj, head of the age-care centre, the Bethany Home takes its name from the Bible.

Bethany was the name of a village Jesus Christ often visited after his long and hard journeys preaching and helping people, she explained.

"Like the warm welcome and solace Jesus Christ received from the village, we try our best to give all khun yai [Grandmas] the same," the nun said, adding after years of hard work the older members of the population deserve such service and care.

The home currently has 50 residents, all female. Most are from Bangkok, Ratchaburi and nearby provinces.

"This is the maximum number we can take good care of," Sister Sirirat said.

"Each year, the home receives a lot of applications and requests. But we can't help all of them due to our limited budget and staff numbers," she added.

According to Social Welfare Department statistics, the number of elderly "neglected" by their family has increased over past years by five to seven percent.

In 1995, 22,115 aging people had nowhere to live. Another 4.5 percent of the country's 5 million elderly had to live alone.

Unfortunately, the country only has 16 government-run age-care centres, providing housing for no more than 3,000.

And with the recent economic crunch putting even more strain on the family, many fear numbers will continue to rise.

Run by five nuns and 10 staff members, the Bethany Home gives first priority to poor, old women in difficult situations, "like those who have no children and live alone," Sister Sirirat explained.

The Bethany Home also admits those suffering from partial paralysis, senile dementia or are too old to help themselves in their daily routines.

"This is why we've got a lot of residents aged over 80. The oldest resident is nearly 96 years old," Sister Sirirat pointed out.

Although the Bethany Home was established by and receives financial support from local Christians, the home does not discriminate by religion.

"People don't have to convert in order to be accepted into our age-care centre. No matter the background, we treat everybody the same," she said.

Once admitted, each resident is given a three-month probation period to ensure they can get along with the others residents and comply with the home's rules and regulations.

"Life here is serene and peaceful," revealed Grandma Poonsuk Sa-nguanrueng, 80, who decided to live in the Bethany Home 10 years ago.

"I'm not married. I have only nieces and nephews. I know each has their own family and lots of responsibility. I don't want to be a burden," she said.

A Christian and former missionary, Grandma Poonsuk feels contented with her life at the moment.

"Staff at the Bethany Home provide me with room and board and take me to see the doctor every month. Relatives and friends come to visit once in a while. That's enough for me. I don't want anything more," said the old woman who looks young for her age.

The young looks, Grandma Poonsuk assured, are thanks to the environment of the home which helps calm her mind.

The Bethany Home is located in a spacious area with lots of trees. In four, one-storey buildings, residents stay in shared bedrooms with their own bed, closet and table.

Each morning, the elderly rise at 6 o'clock. With help from the staff, they go through daily routines like taking a bath and having breakfast.

Then there's an exercise session in an open-air pavilion easily accessible from the home's canteen or residential bedrooms.

"Although some may suffer from partial paralysis, we encourage everyone to come out in the morning to breathe fresh air, smell the flowers and take some exercise," said the Sister.

Exercise is not only good for physical well-being, but also beneficial for mental and emotional health, she added. This early morning exercise with others also makes the old people feel less lonely.

Take Grandma Samniang for example. She doesn't like to be alone. She loves talking to others and helping the staff do this and that.

"It's better than sitting and brooding about the past," the old lady commented.

However, Grandma Samniang is one of the fortunate few who is healthy enough to help staff and join in activities.

According to the home's chief, nearly 80 percent of the residents have to use wheelchairs.

With such physical limitations, it is quite difficult for staff members to encourage this group into activities. Moroever, some are inclined to be emotionally unstable or senile dementia is setting in.

"From time to time, some khun yai may beat us or swear at us without any reason," said Sister Patcharin Paiboonwatanabhon. "But we can't beat or retort back. Instead, we try to understand their emotional condition.

"The aim of the Bethany Home is not only to provide the elderly with healthy food and good accommodation, but also to empathise and understand," she emphasised.

All too often, daughters and sons cannot tolerate the physical and emotional change in their aging parents. Unfortunately, this can lead to neglect, she continued.

"We've found that if we try to provide more understanding," Sister Sirirat added, "most of the elderly will develop for the better within a few months."

This development, however, is easier with the children's cooperation.

"Before we admit the elderly we have one condition for their children or relatives. We ask them to visit at least once every two weeks," the Bethany Home chief pointed out.

"This is because, at the end of the day, what every old person wants most of all is not good service and understanding from us staff members, but whole-hearted love and support from their children."

Info for donations

Name of organisation: Memorial Camillian Sisters Foundation.

Address: 4/2 Moo 12, Tambon Suan Kluay, Ban Pong, Ratchaburi 70110.

Contact person: Sister Sirirat Sriviroj.

Tel: (032) 211-621.

Fax: (032) 211-621.

Savings account name: Camillian Sisters Group (Bethany Home) Savings account number: 316-2-07529-6.

Bank name and branch: Siam City Bank, Ban Pong Branch.

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Safe and sound

Eighty-nine-year-old Grandma Sangwarn Prisuwan burst into tears as she talked about her children. "I have seven kids. But none of them wants me to live with them," she murmured. Grandma Sangwarn is one of thousands of elderly who each year are abandoned by their children or relatives. Realising the plight many older members of the population face, Phra Acharn Daoroeng Ajarakuno, Wat Nhong Hoi's deputy abbot, set up the Wat Nhong Hoi Age-Care Centre for underprivileged elderly in the temple's compound in 1993. The centre aims to provide shelter, medical care and moral support for the elderly, all free of charge. "Our first priority is to help the parents of deceased soldiers or police officers," explained Chuleekorn Tantivorasakul, a nurse and manager of the age-care centre. "But then we open our doors to anybody who needs help." Most of the residents come from impoverished families. Their children are just too poor to support their aging fathers or mothers. At present, eight women and four men live at the centre. "Throughout our five-year operation, only 26 people have lived with us," Ms Chuleekorn continued. "We have to be very careful when admitting anyone because we have a limited budget. All the money comes from donations made by visitors to the temple. "But once admitted, we give them the best care we can." she added. Two assistants work alongside Ms Chuleekorn. They help clean the bedrooms, prepare meals and wash clothes.

"Life here is very comfortable and peaceful," said Grandpa Thongdee Chantrakanok, 90, who has lived at the temple for a year. "I don't want to stay at home because my grandchildren always annoy me. I'd like to live the last years of my life in peace."

Apart from everyday routines, Grandpa Thongdee admits little is organised to help keep the residents active. As a result, he usually spends his time reading, chatting, and thinking about the past. In the evenings, the old man and his friends pray and meditate.

According to the centre's manager, in return for shelter, the residents are required not to partake in alcohol, drugs and gambling. "More importantly, we insist that children or relatives visit their parents at least once a month. This is a must," Ms Chuleekorn emphasised. "Our efforts might only be a drop in the ocean. It may not stop people from neglecting their parents. But at least, we can help by providing safe and sound shelter for the underprivileged in their final years," Ms Chuleekorn concluded. Info for donations Name of organisation: Phra Bodhisattva Guan Yin Foundation. Address: Wat Nhong Hoi, Tambon Khao Rang, Muang Ratchaburi, Ratchaburi, 70000. Contact person: Ms Chuleekorn Tantivorasakul. Tel: (032) 396-044-5. Savings account name: Phra Bodhisattva Guan Yin Foundation. Savings account number: 039-2-10617-2. Bank name and branch: Bangkok Metropolitan Bank, Ratchaburi Branch.