August 24, 1999
We care A little bit of give and take The many differences between the orphans and elderly become insignificant when they have the opportunity to love and be loved. Instead of burying themselves in their past, abandoned old folks from a home in Chiang Mai are pushing their physical and emotional limits-being surrogate grandparents to HIV/Aids children and caring for other elderly people Karnjariya Sukrung To many elderly people at Thammapakorn Home for the Aged in Chiang Mai, Wednesday is a special day. It's a day they look forward to all week long. It is the day they baby-sit and entertain HIV/Aids orphans. All the youngsters at Viengping Children's Home have been touched by the deadly HIV virus in some way. Many of them are HIV positive themselves or have lost their parents to Aids. Inthow Khantawong, 76, wakes up at 4 a.m., earlier than any other day, to rummage through her trivia for cookies and snacks from donations she keeps in secret places. They are treats for the children. All night, Nopporn Saphanon, 62, recites a tale of a witty monkey and a foolish crocodile that she is going to tell the youngsters. Boonyueng Kulchaisri, 96, hums a likay song he is going to teach them. Other old folks are also getting ready to go to the orphanage. At the Viengping Children's Home, the 10 old people will baby-sit 40 children aged between four and five for about two hours. Although some might say it's too tiring a job for old folks, they wouldn't agree. "I love children. Being with them keeps me alive and happy. It's like I'm back in a family again," said Mrs Inthow. And Kaew Chumjit, 75 said: "The children are not at all naughty. They are adorable." From 9 to 11 a.m., the surrogate grandmas and grandpas chat, play games and feed the children. They also, perform some traditional shows like singing likay songs and do traditional dances to entertain the children. And although some might dismiss these little shows as entertainment by oldies for vulnerable orphans, the grandmas and grandpas spend hours during the week rehearsing-they even have a classical dance teacher who comes every Thursday. And they prepare elaborate costumes for the shows. These shows not only entertain the children, but they give an outlet to the older people to express their talents and skills. Each Wednesday, the old folks from Thammapakorn Home arrange games, plays and shows to entertain children. Mrs Nopporn, who was once a singer with the famous Suntaraporn band, uses her gift in singing and performing to entertain children. "It's like returning to the good old days when I was on stage singing to the audience or in front of the TV camera. Well at least, I won't forget what I can do," she smiled. She also coaches the other old folks. Mr Boonyueng, 96, a former soldier who has fought in two wars, teaches the children to sing likay songs and traditional choy songs. During the visit, both the children and the elderly have a ball. They dance, sing and play games together like there is no generation gap between them. The children sit in their laps, hug them and ask them questions. The older people love to hug and kiss them back and never lose patience with their questions-and they are perhaps too old to get angry when the little ones become naughty. "Look at them when they are together, talking and playing, you'd think the old people are the children's best playmates," said Suchada Rungroeng, an occupational trainer and social worker at Thammapakorn Home. The smiles and giggles the children and elderly share today was not easy to come by. When the project started three years ago, the children and elderly were distant. "The children cried when they saw wrinkled faces and some of the elderly were afraid of having contact with children with HIV and Aids," said Ms Suchada. "But after several visits the ice was broken and new bonds were formed." If not for these special activities, Wednesday would be just another lonely day for the elderly. They would get up, do exercises, eat, talk with the same old faces they have seen for years, read, sleep or just spend their time being with themselves and their past. Though the home encourages them to engage in recreational programmes like occupational training, many still choose an inactive life. "Getting involved in community service gives them back life," said Uttraporn Bunnag, 49, the superintendent at Thammapakorn Home for Elderly. "They feel they are still capable of doing good things for others, of making these children happy. "By giving themselves, they get their self esteem back." she added. "Besides, it helps keep them from feeling lonely. They feel they have a family once again," she said. A family. That is what both, the orphans and the abandoned elderly, yearn for. "The orphans and these elderly people share one thing; they are forsaken and need love," said Mayuree Yoktree, superintendent of Viengping Children's Home. "Orphans yearn for love from anyone of any age group. At the home, we don't have many staff to give the children love. So these elderly people can help fill these young hearts with love-even though it's just once a week," she added. The children feel this bond too, and because of it Wednesday is a special day for them too. "Grandma and Grandpa love me. They hug me and kiss me, give me sweets and play games with me. I love them," said Nam, six. Sometimes the experience is overwhelming and some of the older people shed tears of happiness-and sadness-when with the children. The youngsters remind them of their own children, some of whom are dead and some of whom have dumped them. "Sometimes when I am with these children, holding them, talking to them and playing with them, I can't help crying. They remind me of my children. I miss them," Mrs Nopporn said, her eyes brimming with tears. Mr Boonyueng came to Thammapakorn Home after his wife and their four children passed away. Alone in this world, these orphans are his only relations. "Being with the children relaxes me. They treat us like their parents though they call us grandpa or grandma," said Mr Boonyueng. "The elderly are not only receivers. They are also givers and contributors to society," says Uttraporn Bunnag (above), superintendent of Thammapakorn Home for Elderly. Apart from being surrogate relations to the orphans, the Thammapakorn elderly are also busy helping other less privileged old folks. Since Thammapakorn Home is located in the middle of Chiang Mai, it never lacks visitors, food and donations. The abandoned elderly in other old folks' homes, particularly those in remote areas, are not as fortunate, though. Ms Uttraporn said the home has a programme called Tarn Nam Jai through which extra donations are distributed to other old folks' homes. The elderly donate some of the things they no longer use or things they want to share such as herbal medicines, balms and inhalants. A group of 10 elderly volunteers collect their friends' donations and once a month they act as representatives and give donations to the less fortunate people in remote homes in Chiang Mai. The visits give them a chance to make friends with other old people in other homes. "Giving is important. Many of the elderly at the home are used to becoming receivers. They have to wai donors though they are much older than the givers," said Ms Uttraporn. "But if they can be givers sometimes, they will feel good about themselves which is very important for their mind and their health." For the elderly volunteers, getting involved in community service can give them back dignity, another important concrete reward is a chance to go out, meet people, visit temples and natural sites-like they used to do when they were on their own. "By being active in volunteer work, the elderly are telling us they are still givers and contributors to society," said Ms Uttraporn. Info for donations: Name: Thammapakorn Home for the Aged Founder: Department of Public Welfare, Ministry of Labour and Social Welfare Contact Person: Uttraporn Bunnag Address: 1 Moonmuang Road, Phrasing sub-district, Muang District, Chiang Mai 50200 Tel: (053) 278-573 Or send your cheque payable to Post Publishing Public Company Limited (For Thammapakorn Home) to Kusuma Mintakhin, Editorial Manager, 136 Na Ranong Road, off Sunthorn Kosa, Klong Toey, Bangkok 10110. Her telephone number is 240-3700 ext 3224-5. Please also include your name and address with your cheque so we can send you a receipt. "We Care" is a weekly series honouring people who believe in giving. Apart from supporting these causes, you can also let us know about people who unselfishly help others so we can make more people aware of their efforts. Fax "We Care" on 240-3668 or call 240-3700 ext 3208 or 3212. Email can be sent to: sanitsuda@bangkokpost.net For a comprehensive list of charities covered by "We Care" weekly series, see the Bangkok Post Website at http://www.bangkokpost.net/outlookwecare/		Current Issues in Thailand Bangkok Post Year-end Economic Review NEW! SEA Games news archive! Database 10 yrs Thailand Tatler Magazine Classifieds Jobs Property Entertainment Investment Education Travel Sales Learn English Weekly Database Horizons NiteOwl Student Weekly Real Time Special We Care NEW! Phudhong Foundation leper colony Back Issues Company Servcies Subscriptions Advertising Annual Report
© Copyright The Post Publishing Public Co., Ltd. 1999 Last Modified: Tue, Aug 24, 1999 For comments and letters to the editor see : notes Comments to: Webmaster Advertisng enquiries to Internet Marketing