Prenuptial agreements: What's love got to do with it?

Prenuptial agreements: What's love got to do with it?

When I was young, I was in love and foolish. Now that I'm old, I'm still very much in love with the same woman I married, but deep down I don't think I'm any wiser. Most men my age behave like a five-year-old who is trapped inside a 50-year-old's body. Some psychiatrists call this a mid-life crisis, when men in this age group are usually married to the same woman for 20-plus years with adult children leaving home for college and more often than not bored out of their minds. Some men rely on fast cars and big bikes to get over this period. Some seek the companionship of younger women to fill the void.

Porsches and Harley-Davidsons, although expensive, are pretty harmless compared to having a mistress or a new wife (I am sure my wife would agree with me on this). The latest tabloid headlines concern a billionaire getting hitched to a young actress 30 years his junior. I don't normally pay much attention to other people's love lives, but my curiosity got the better of me this time, and I can't help but wonder why he did what he did. Maybe it's love, but then again according to the newswire, this is certainly not his first marriage _ or even his fifth for that matter.

As for him, given the number of times he has tried the married life, I'm fairly certain he is well advised on what to do. Love is a funny thing _ it cannot really be explained, it has to be experienced. For any male readers itching to leave their Mrs and run away with a young thing, here are a few words of advice.

Before you walk down the aisle again, get your paperwork in place through a prenuptial agreement, or prenup for short. The content of a prenuptial agreement can vary widely but commonly includes provisions for then division of assets and spousal support in the event of divorce. They may also include terms for the forfeiture of assets as a result of divorce on the grounds of adultery.

In Thailand, the Thai Civil and Commercial Code govern a prenuptial agreement, which must be registered at the local district where the parties decide to register their marriage. Does that sound too unromantic? Yes, but it is necessary, I'm afraid.

A prenup is no longer just something for the rich and famous. It's for people who have assets they want to protect and possibly shield should a spouse secretly run up massive credit card debt, which could damage both partners' credit scores. On a broader level, prenups have gained more acceptance as a financial planning tool.

As marital trends change, so do attitudes. Many couples are tying the knot at an older age, or those entering a second or third marriage are bringing more assets to the relationship than a 25-year-old would have. In the US, the divorce rate in 2008 was about 50% and the median duration of married life 18 years, according to a Pew Research Center analysis of government data. Given those odds, hope is not a financial plan, and the time to plan for a divorce is not when you are in a state of hate.

Prenups are absolutely essential for those getting married for the second time, those with children from previous marriages or those with wealthy parents. Before tying the knot, couples should sort through issues such as personal debt, financial obligations and the possibility of future inheritances. Financial planners call this process "financial intimacy". If your potential partner is not open to this process, you can expect serious problems down the road.

Apparently Prince William married Kate Middleton without a prenup even though his mother's former private secretary advised him to get something in writing to ensure that every future eventuality was considered. Let's just hope he is smarter than his parents, uncles and aunts, whose marriages did not last. You cannot fully insulate yourself against marital heartbreak, but at least with a prenup you can protect your assets.


Teera Phutrakul is chairman of the Thai Financial Planners Association. Contact him at teerap@truemail.co.th

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