The recent passage of the Marriage Equality bill in Thailand marks a historic shift towards greater inclusivity. Yet, for many same-sex couples, the journey towards full legal recognition remains incomplete.
Jacob Holder and Surapong Koonpaew face a maze of challenges as they fight for recognition of their family, including their newborn son, in a country where surrogacy laws remain bound by outdated definitions of marriage.
Holder, an American expatriate who has called Thailand home for 12 years, and Surapong, a Thai civil servant and PhD candidate from Pattani, have experienced these challenges firsthand. The couple, who first met at a New Year's party in 2020, celebrated their union with a virtual wedding in 2023.
However, their marriage was only legally recognised in the United States, finalised through an online QR code from Utah.
The couple travelled to Colombia in search of a surrogate for their baby, Elijah Bprin. Although the marriage equality law allows same-sex couples to adopt, it does not extend to the right to use surrogates.
Panida Limkoppaiboon and Kansiree Limkoppaiboon anticipating the arrival of twins.
This is due to the fact that the existing surrogacy law, established in 2015, continues to use binary terms like "wife" and "husband".
Currently in Thailand, surrogacy is only legal for heterosexual married couples and must involve a surrogate who is a relative.
Upon their return to Thailand, Surapong's legal connection to Elijah remains unrecognised, highlighting the ongoing disparities in legal protections for same-sex families in the country.
Surapong never dreamed of having kids until he met Holder.
"When I was younger, I wanted to have kids... But then my dream of having a family, having kids kind of disappeared because I thought, 'How is it possible to have kids as a gay man', " Surapong said.
Holder was determined to start a family, and spent years looking into all the possibilities.
"We're bringing life into this world," Holder said. "Transparency from the onset will make me feel more comfortable."
Holder, fluent in Spanish, found Colombia's surrogacy system particularly supportive. The couple arranged for one egg donor and two separate surrogates, enabling them to create embryos using both of their sperm so the siblings could be biologically related through the egg donor.
Unfortunately, the surrogate carrying Surapong's sperm experienced a miscarriage. However, in a rare and generous gesture, the egg donor agreed to provide additional eggs after being informed of the situation.
All of baby Elijah's passports.
This will allow the couple the opportunity to try for a sibling for Elijah.
"That baby will be born to the same parents, and the same structure in the same household, but will have a different nationality," Holder said. "These laws can separate siblings legally."
Elijah is currently in Thailand on a tourist visa, and holds Colombian and American nationality, but they are working to get him citizenship in Thailand. According to their lawyer, Elijah has no right to live in the same country as his Thai father without a visa -- even if adopted.
When Surapong travels with Elijah without Holder, there are concerns around paperwork that he will need to carry.
"Policy change can happen overnight, but cultural change takes longer," Holder said.
Two business owners, Kansiree Limkoppaiboon and Panida Limkoppaiboon, embarked on parenthood to fulfil their lifelong dreams.
Kansiree chose to conceive with the help of a sperm donor from another province, a practice less regulated than surrogacy in Thailand.
On Feb 16, 2023, the couple joyfully welcomed twins. However, without the protection of the yet-to-be-enacted Marriage Equality Bill, their relationship lacked legal recognition. Under Thai law, children's legal rights are only extended to biological relatives, leaving Panida without a legal connection to the twins.
To secure their family's future, Panida adopted Kansiree before the bill's passage, ensuring they could share the benefits of their accumulated wealth.
"That was the only thing we could do to make us live together as a family," Panida said.
But when the twins were born, Panida was legally recognised as their grandmother instead of their second mother.
This legal discrepancy has driven the civil group's efforts to amend the law, advocating for the replacement of "father" and "mother" with the gender-neutral term "first-level guardians" in sections related to guardianship. This change aims to ensure inclusive legal recognition and guardianship for all families, regardless of their structure.
"After we have changed our legal relationship, I will need to adopt my children to ensure our legal rights as mother and child," Panida said.
