The recent PostScript column concerning the unlikely combination of bathroom submarines and cornflakes prompted a number of seasoned readers to recall their childhood breakfast delights.
One veteran of bathroom battles pointed out that I had unforgivably overlooked the plastic frogmen which accompanied the Kellogg's subs.
There have been tales from readers about munching on Cocoa Puffs, Cap'n Crunch, Frosties, Twinkies, Winkies or whatever, before dashing off to school.
To entice youngsters to consume a particular brand there were plenty of slogans. One of the more popular, promoting Frosties, featured Tony the Tiger announcing "They're not good. They're Gr-r-reat!" Shredded Wheat announced "That 'Good Morning' Feeling" while Kellogg's Rice Krispies probably had the most memorable catchphrase with "Snap! Crackle! Pop!"
Then there were Wheaties advertised as the "Breakfast of Champions" featuring famous sportsmen including Brooklyn Dodgers baseball star Jackie Robinson who informed us that "ball players go for milk, fruit and Wheaties."
Breakfast of Champions later became the title of a famous Kurt Vonnegut novel.
However the "breakfast" referred to in the book was actually a martini.
Nosebag nosh
Whatever your taste, breakfast is arguably the most important meal of the day, something that gets you off to a good start. As a kid I grew up in a cornflakes environment, but did have a brief flirtation with Rice Krispies, possibly influenced by the slick "Snap! Crackle! Pop!" campaign.
As a teenager I wasn't a huge cereal consumer, maybe as a result of reading a comment by author Roald Dahl in which he observed that cereals are "made of all those curly wood-shavings you find in pencil sharpeners". Another cereal sceptic was English humorist Frank Muir who was a traditional bacon and eggs man. He likened muesli to "the leavings of carthorse nosebags" and the "sweepings of racing stables".
The cereals that rocked
Something that might surprise people is that the Rolling Stones made an advertising jingle for Rice Krispies which aired on British television in 1964.
It was just when the Stones were breaking through and would do anything for a few extra quid.
You can find it on the internet and it's not a bad sound. The jingle resembles the Stones' early Chuck Berry cover versions, with guitar riffs, wailing harmonica and Mick Jagger in good voice as he extols the virtues of consuming crispy rice.
Inevitably the lyrics are a bit dodgy, but to his credit Jagger makes "pour on the milk and listen to the crackle of that rice" sound quite funky.
The joy of kippers
A Scottish reader reports he much prefers kippers (smoked herring) to cereals for breakfast because "at least they have a bit of taste". He is right about the taste, although "acquired taste" is perhaps more accurate. When I was a kid I used to dread it when my mum announced it was "kipper day". It wasn't so much the taste, but I seemed to spend more time extracting the bones out of the fish rather than eating it.
However, after a couple of vacations in Scotland where it was hard to escape kippers, I soon adapted. To get into the spirit of things for today's column I actually purchased some "smokey golden" kippers from the supermarket and they became Thursday's breakfast. I really enjoyed them too, possibly because I had not tasted a kipper for a while. It goes down very well accompanied by bread and butter.
Breakfast in America
Kippers have made a number of inroads into literature. Followers of PG Wodehouse novels know that Bertie Wooster liked to begin the day with kippers for breakfast because he felt they were good for the brain. However, he also appeared partial to less healthy indulgences at the breakfast table. In My Man Jeeves, an off-colour Bertie comments: "I hadn't the heart to touch my breakfast. I told Jeeves to drink it himself."
Wodehouse must have had a thing about kippers. One of the characters in his novels is a childhood friend of Bertie called Reginald Herring, inevitably nicknamed "Kipper".
Harry Potter devotees will be aware that kippers were regularly served for breakfast in the Great Hall. Harry's ginger-haired mate Ron Weasley also gagged on a portion of kipper that went down the wrong way.
We must not forget the English pop group Supertramp who did their bit to popularise kippers in their 1979 hit Breakfast in America which included the plaintive cry from singer/composer Roger Hodgson "Could we have kippers for breakfast, mummy dear, mummy dear?"
The Flying Kipper
Kippers brings to mind the Fawlty Towers episode "The Kipper and the Corpse". It features Basil in a state of panic after he fears a guest has died after being served a breakfast of kippers.
The smoked herring also plays a significant role in the children's television series Thomas the Tank Engine. Making regular appearances is "The Flying Kipper", an express fish train normally pulled by Henry the Green Engine. It gets involved in all sort of dramas and has even been known to crash. When Henry is under repairs, the Fat Controller asks Gordon to pull the fish train but the snooty express engine refuses saying it was "far too smelly" for an engine of his status. I wonder if any readers are currently partaking of a kipper breakfast. Enjoy, but watch out for the bones.
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