My friend from Malaysia sent me an email saying he couldn't make a business trip to Bangkok as planned out of fear after a bomb rattled the capital on St Valentine's Day.
That day I was in Hua Hin on holiday. It was my family in China who informed me about the bombing. They worried about my safety just as they did during the massive flood last year. When I told them I was outside of Bangkok and therefore was safe, they still warned me to "be careful, it's not totally safe!"
Both my friend's change of schedule and my family's warning reminded me of something. Earlier last year, when I was still in Beijing with my family, my American friend and her husband were about to leave Dongzhimen, the central area of old Beijing, the area they loved so much they had settled down there. But a bomb incident, without casualties, made them change their perspective about the charming city. Their decision shocks me.
Both my friends and family have sound reasons to be concerned. Security _ as well as safety _ is not something we can compromise. This was the reason I followed my colleagues' instruction during the city floods even though I did not see any drop of water at my apartment or at the office to take long leave and join my family in Beijing.
However, what if there happened to be another bombing _ or bomb threat _ in Beijing at that time? Did I have to move to another country again?
The question sounds ridiculous; but it does say something.
Though seeking security is a human instinct, it doesn't mean we should be shaken every time there is a bombing, assassination, or similar sorts of things. After all, there is absolute safety in the world. When people thought the US had the most advanced defensive system in the world, it was devastated by "9/11"; Norway was perfect as one of the world's safest places, then it was hit by a bomb and mass killing.
Not only physically. When women say marriage is safe, love vanishes; when people say money brings about security, health denies; when history says continuous progress gives birth to peace, war is there.
So, what should we do if what we crave badly doesn't exist at all?
Buddhists and followers of other religions suggest creating a peaceful mind and then you will be perfectly safe. That may be a healthy attitude and a good solution. But the problem is not everybody in the world has a religious lineage.
For ordinary people, one possible way to maintain security might be accepting whatever life brings. Don't get me wrong. I am not saying one should confront a bombing without trying to find an escape; you surely should run for life in that case. I am talking about a fact that though one single accident might be avoided, not all tragedies in life can be eluded. Rather than passively escaping, a better solution is learning to live with uncertainties. They are always there.
We will be truly secure only when we are well-informed and well-prepared _ at least in our minds _ no matter what we are exposed to. Perfect safety exists nowhere but in our hearts.
Xiangyang Tang is a reporter from Beijing on the FK exchange programme.