My previous article, about the metro-bus, described serious yet funny experiences which make our government's first-car policy very tempting. The lack of standards or quality of service counted for nothing as commuters seemed content, as if there's nothing wrong in the way the buses operate.
It doesn't stop there, however. This time it's the taxicab's turn. As a Bangkokian who doesn't own or drive a car, the taxi is one of the top three modes of travel, followed by the bus and train.
My reason for not driving can be summed up by the acronym GMC _ gasoline, maintenance, car licence and insurance _ none of which are conducive to building a healthy bank account. That's why I'm stuck with public transportation. This is Thailand and the standards aren't what they should be. But what choice do we have?
For starters, take the colour of taxis. Unlike in Japan or South Korea where colour is used to indicate taxi rate (depending on quality of service or size of passenger seat), taxis in Thailand _ no matter what colour _ have the same 35 baht starting fee. Colours are only used to differentiate taxi companies.
Hence, I proudly present the world's most colourful fleet beginning with one-tone taxis _ yellow, pink, green, blue, brown, and progressing to two-tones _ blue-red, green-yellow and pink-white.
Since everywhere is a taxi stand, to get a cab just extend your arm to hail one. Although first-come, first-serve basis is the system here, there's always someone who will walk past you and cut in line. The remedy is to outrun them, trust me. Of course, a more effective solution would be to create real taxi stands. That would ease traffic jams too.
Unfortunately, successfully hailing a taxi doesn't necessarily mean you are going anywhere. Let the excuses begin. "Song rote" (My shift is nearly over and I have to return my car) or "Gas mote" (I'm almost out of petrol) are the two most common. In general, these are excuses for not wanting to go your way. Two to five rejections are common. Keep trying, don't lose faith.
Once you're seated, the driver will usually start creating a friendly experience. Ice breaking topics include how you are, how has your day been going, your opinion on politics (worst topic ever) or complaining about traffic jams etc. It's a bit like a long lost friend trying to catch up on things _ even if it's against your will.
Here are two things I've learned from the passenger seat: one, never tell the driver you're in a rush. It will awaken the sleeping Formula One demon in him and soon you'll find yourself running red lights and overtaking other cars. Two, it's your job to calm driver down. I've often heard "Deaw ying meng leaw" (I'll shoot you) shouted at an overtaking cab driver in a parallel lane.
If they really decide to have a shootout, I will be the first to go. All I can do is chit-chat and hope that will distract him.
Anger management training is too expensive and too late. Perhaps the driver has made a deal with a life insurance company, something I'm now seriously considering.
Not all drivers are like that though. Luckily, I've had a chance to experience the better type recently.
What's more, there is even a silver lining in the form of a hotline, 1584, which passengers can ring and file complaints with, and the driver will be slapped with a fine or have difficulty renewing his/her driving licence.
There is also a "Taxi Reporter" app that enables you report bad behaviour instantly from your iPhone & iPad.
The complaints are listed under four categories _ not accepting passengers, breaking traffic rules, behaving badly, and cheating on the fare. Hopefully this app will become popular and create a standard for good behaviour among taxi drivers.
Here's a wish. I hope in the second half of this year taxi services will improve, (again: not all drivers are at fault) otherwise driving my own car is beginning to seem a more reasonable option with every passing day. And that means more cars on the road and even more horrendous traffic jams.
Sithikorn Wongwudthianun is a reporter for the multi-media section of the Bangkok Post.