People, it's not even April yet, and the city feels as though it's been chosen as the launch site for the opening of the gates of hell. Stay cool and hydrated. Make this your daily mantra. This, we're serious about. But as you sip your sweet ice coffee under some air-conditioned refuge, we offer you a light-hearted recap of a few funny, exciting or random bits of news that are theoretical and totally scientific explanations of why this country is so ******* hot right now!
Opening of the Playboy Cafe
Photos: Fb.com/playboycafe
Move aside Hooters. Playboy just launched a flagship cafe, and it is plush. Complete with a legit bar, rib-eye steak on the menu, spacious velvet seats and, of course, the bunny symbol everywhereee, this themed cafe is clearly fashioned off the lifestyle of the Hef. On that note, you know they went all out with the grand opening of Thailand's first Playboy Cafe. Cooper Hefner, the heir to Playboy, was flown in for the ceremony and walked the black carpet with our sweetheart Kimberly Anne Tiamsiri. What we find ironic here, however, is that this posh adult themed cafe is located out in Central Festival Eastville -- catch our drift? Word is that 30 more branches across the nation are being planned for opening over the next five years.
Raised the temperature: half a degree, but a sexy half.
Bangkok on Top for Dining
Photo: Lerkdee Production
Announcements like us winning "Most Congested City in the World" are boring and underwhelming to the point of annoyance. Because nobody is trying to win that race. We have been the promising lead for a while. But when it's a highly competitive contest, like food, where there is no room for snooze because everyone's eyeing the prize, that's when winning is hot. Not only did our Gaggan take number one on Asia's 50 Best Restaurants for the third consecutive year - a tough feat to pull - another eight of our restaurants made the list, with Nahm all the way up at fifth place. And our culinary scene hasn't just stopped there. We're in the middle of launching our own editions of Top Chef and Masterchef. It has also been confirmed that we will be stealing Singapore's thunder by becoming the second Southeast Asian nation to have its own Michelin Guide. Go us!
Raised the temperature: 2 spicy, salty and sweet degrees.
Joan Cornella in BKK
Never in our wildest, most sickest dreams would we have imagined Joan Cornella, a front-runner in contemporary black humour, to host a solo show in Bangkok. But he's here! And his show is really happening tonight at one of Bangkok's latest and hippest art venues, Future Factory Bangkok. What can we say, apart from expect Cornella's brand of cute sadism, which typically involves a lot of dismemberment, heads in awkward places, fire and things that are just so wrong one cannot even begin to explain. Diehard fans, don't forget to bring cash to purchase takeaways.
Raised the temperature: 3 satisfyingly sadistic degrees.
"Not in this Lifetime", Sure.
Photo: Viji Corp
Sweet child o' mine, they did not cancel on us! At last, Guns 'N Roses live in Bangkok happened in our lifetime. Axl, Slash, Duff, Dizzy, someone who looked like Izzy but wasn't Izzy (Richard Fortus) and two other newer members, drummer Frank Ferrer and keyboardist Melissa Reese, gave 10,000 Thai and foreign fans at Muang Thong Thani a show they'll never forget. Opening with It's So Easy from their smashing first album, over the next two full hours, the rock band played a wide variety of selections from their 32-year career, peaking of course with "she's gotta a smile that sings to me…". With plenty of guitar solos throughout the concert, Axl at a grand piano for November Rain and four encores, try and tell us Bangkok wasn't lit that night!
Raised the temperature: 8 "I wanna hear you scream" degrees.
The Rebel Riot's Landing
Photo: Fb.com/therebelriot
Hopefully you didn't miss a chance to catch The Rebel Riot band from Myanmar when they were here last week. Making appearances at venues like Mezzanine, The Overstay and Gallery Ver for the Bangkok Underground Film Festival, let us tell you that they tore the houses down! Not only with their passionate screaming and headbanging when performing, but even in perfectly still and candid moments, with the crowd asking questions such as how they feel about Buddhism after what it has done to Myanmar. The band offered this eloquent response in return: "If you fight for Buddhism, if you fight for religion, you are not fighting for religion, you are a religious idiot." Mic drop and then roars.
Raised the temperature: 9 punk*ss degrees.
Waddee, Leo!
Having achieved his ultimate and longgggg overdue goal last year, Leonardo Dicaprio decided to play it chill right before the Oscars and take a quick vacay to where else but amazing Thailand. Yes, that's right. While Gosling, Garfield, Washington, Affleck and Mortensen were probably working hard on their acceptance speeches for Best Actor, Leo was here, sightseeing Ayutthaya Historical Park in a slim white tee, cargos, shades and a fanny pack. A fanny pack. Is that now the new hawt? Clearly. Go see for yourself on the Google. You're welcome.
Raised the temperature:
10 environmentally friendly degrees.
10 degrees within a degree. Degree inception. Deception.
10 degrees Rose could have shifted over to make room for Jack. Okay, we'll stop now.
The Fugitive Monk Fiasco
One word to sum this up: infuriating. If this news hasn't made your blood boil, well then you clearly know where "Thummy" is. How a monk gets away from a billion baht worth of embezzlement in a country that is particularly religious and superstitious is beyond us. The story gets petty as well as with bed rest decoys, but seriously, sick or not, how hard is it to catch a monk who's no spring chicken? Apparently very, if he's got that much loot. To keep you from overheating, here are a few of the many memes that came out of this cultural embarrassment.
Photo: Pongsakorn Pengjan
Photo: fb.com/slowerlife
Photo: fb.com/slowerlife
Raised the temperature:
666 degrees
Memes: -651 degrees
The Thai-Belgian Overpass Fire
Photo: Tawatchai Kemgumnerd
How could we not make an actual fire the number one hottest thing to happen to Bangkok in recent times? Imagine taking your usual Rama IV Road route to corporate Bangkok at 7-8am in the morning and seeing flames ablaze. On the one hand this may be the only chance you'll get to feel like a bad*ss stunt driver by driving through fire. On the other hand, hell no and I need answers! Turns out the fire was caused by something as simple as unattended trash -- so they say. One thing's for certain though. With the repairs that still need to be made, we're looking at a consecutive year win of "Most Congested City in the World."
Raised the temperature: 20 frustrating degrees that could have been easily avoided.
