In an effort to enable parents to educate children on their bodies and consent, UN Women's Regional Goodwill ambassador and rights activist Cindy Bishop recently launched a book titled My Body My Rules, the latest in her endeavour to highlight issues connected with children's understanding of their bodies and their rights over it.
The colourfully illustrated book -- now available in Thai and set to be translated into English in due time -- is said to be a natural progression of her two-year campaign highlighting issues ranging from violence against women to stereotypes, gender-based violence and more.
One of the many questions that arose from these campaigns was: where does this stem from?
"I realised very quickly it is a multigenerational, multicultural issue that is embedded in how we are teaching our children today. So, if that is the case, as a mother, I realise that we as parents have a bigger responsibility to teach our children from day one how to be respectful of other people's privacy, how to take care of ourself, how to protect ourself, how to ask for, and give, consent, and how to use your voice in situations where you are not comfortable," said Cindy.
Thai celebrity Cindy Bishop's children's book My body My Rules is a tool to help parents educate their children about sexual advances by adults. Photos Courtesy of Nanmee Books
"Experiencing that as a mother while simultaneously doing my advocacy work, I soon realised there is something here. I felt like there was something missing in Thai society and that we are shying away from speaking to our children about even the basic natural development of our bodies. If we cannot speak about that, how can we tackle trickier subjects?" she added.
Her personal dilemma of not being able to find age-appropriate material on the subject for her children in Thailand further set in motion the momentum she needed to eventually write her own book after she hit a dead-end trying to find another book on this topic.
"Even searching 'My body is my body' in Thai on Google gives you just a diagram of a kid with all the organs labelled but the genitalia area is just a blank space. I felt this was extremely disturbing. I questioned why we aren't talking about this? It's not shameful or ugly. It is part of our body.
"This is when I thought whether I could provide something not only I could use but also something that other parents looking for that kind of information could use.''
It was at this time that Cindy, a popular Thai celebrity, began her journey to put together a child-friendly tool-book that parents can use to explain body development to their children as well as other things youngsters should know to become aware of which body parts should not be touched by others without their consent.
As she was gathering the information required for the book, the mother of two received a timely invitation by the previous ambassador of Sweden to attend a seminar organised by Unesco on its International Technical Guidance On Sexuality Education.
The event, which focused on an evidence-informed approach, proved beneficial for her as the guidelines offered were applicable for children of every nation and explained body development, relationships, knowledge, attitude and skills in an age-appropriate manner.
A significant amount of information from these guidelines has been incorporated into her book My Body My Rules.
"The book, which is designed for children between the ages of five and eight, was researched and is based according to international guidelines provided by Unesco. It is designed to be read with the child and his/her parents. There are also notes to parents at the beginning of the book explaining why I wrote it and the issues I deem to be important. The narrative is told by an older sister and younger brother, obviously based on my own children, who are eight and 10. I wanted it to be conversational. The book talks about serious subjects in a way that is not frightening. The whole idea is to make it relatable and easy to understand.
"I go through a range of topics. For example, I discuss how amazing our bodies are -- every part of the body -- even people who don't look the same. Also, what are parts of your body that you think is amazing? While everyone is different, we are all important and must know how to take care of our body, ranging from cleanliness to safety. The book then goes into how to refer to reproductive organs but in a way that it is not made up of funny names or skirting around the issue. At the end of the day, these body parts are yours and you are the one responsible for them. When you are young, parents help take care of your body but when you're big, you have to do it on your own. This book is laying the groundwork so that there is no excuse for anyone to be touching you in an inappropriate manner."
Thai celebrity Cindy Bishop's children's book My body My Rules is a tool to help parents educate their children about sexual advances made on children by adults. Courtesy of Nanmee Books
The next part of the story touches on what is private and public space. What can you do in a private space that you cannot do in public space? If someone wants to come into your private space, they need permission.
There is also the "body bubble", which she describes as the area around your body which is your private space. Anyone who desires to enter this space needs permission.
"You have the right to say excuse me, you are too close."
She goes on to explore queries such as how to say no and what is no?
Cindy said the need for a child to understand what consent meant was high on her list of priorities.
"Consent is basically asking for permission. Can I hold your hand? If she says yes, then you can but if she doesn't say anything or says no, that is her prerogative. We can explain these things to children at a level that they understand. They need to know that they are the bosses of their body. They have the right to say what they are comfortable with, or not comfortable with, even when it comes to showing affection.
"The book also mentions what are good secrets and bad secrets. Anything that makes you feel scared or in pain. Towards the end of the book, we explore the 'circle of trust'. Here children can pick five people who they feel they can reach out to for assistance if an issue arises."
My Body My Rules is available at leading bookstores nationwide or via nanmeebooks.com.
